Tell me your stupidest death stories...

[R-Dog2422 13]

I was in a house in cherno, minding my own business, unarmed. When all of the sudden, I see some beans on the ground. I went to pick them up, but I get attacked by a guy in the house. He emptied his m16 into my back, yelling "GIMME YOUR BEEEAAANNSSS!" I almost didn't go in that house. If I didn't go in, I would have avoided that completely.

Edited March 3, 2013 by R-Dog2422

[Concise 13]

In my earlier trials, I had my legs broken near the NE Airfield. I had never used morphine, but understood it to exist. I decided to crawl around Krasnostav for two days, from the woodline at 112 027 to the barns and back, rather than try to crawl all the way to Berezino. I began to hope and wish for another survivor to come along so that I could murder him/her and take his morphine, if'n they had any, but no one ever came:(

At some point I dragged my myself to Mount Klen to hunt, and began to go thirsty, so I set my bearings to Black Lake. Somewhere around 130 030 (I didn't have a compass so my bearings weren't exactly accurate, hence the detour) I found an ATV. Yes! Fuck yeah, holy shit woooo! I must have been paranoid about making too much noise, as instead of going to Berezino I followed the large power lines towards Novy Sobor, riding as fast as I could and being just oh so happy. I hit the road at 087 060 too hard, went flying rather unhappily and confused through the air and tumbled into the grass. The ATV caught fire, but miraculously I wasn't too hurt.

I continued to follow the power lines and came upon the deer stand at 077 066. I'm an atheist, but I swear that god encouraged me to check it, because who knows? Maybe there would be some morphine. Guess what? Yep, there sure was.

Oh to be running again! Not as fast as the ATV, but that's a luxury. I was happy to have my feet back. Right at about 074 067, I decided to get high and fuck with my video settings. I hit escape, packed, smoked, and in my highness managed to miss the Video Options and instead hit "Respawn". I was struck dumb by the "You are dead" notification and stared at my screen in disbelief. I'm pleased that that button has been disabled.

Edited March 3, 2013 by Concise

[Merrick362 (DayZ) 263]

Sprint-proneing off a roof...

[OfficerRaymond 2064]

Tractor @ 35mph into a tree. Wreckless driving. Nuff' said.

[Irish. 4886]

Tractor @ 35mph into a tree. Wreckless driving. Nuff' said.

lol

[Heeldawg 2]

Today. I'm gettin shot at by some guy. I run into the woods, all the while in prone. The guy shooting me on my tail ( mind you I'm way low on blood) I play dead and then the guy shooting comes up to me with an ak. I know I'm gonna die so I stand there waiting for a swift death. Guy has shit aim, tries to headshot me, misses, knocking me out. Next thing I'm faking (FAKEing) dead on the ground. A hero comes up and he notices I'm not dead. He gives me blood. I'm very thankful. Not 15 seconds later. The same Fing bandit comes up to me, this time killing me. 5 secs later, the heros death is in chat.

Edited March 3, 2013 by Heeldawg

[liquidmind 320]

It was, I was going to hunt him down and kill him! But I wasn't a dick about it on side chat so he decided I was alright and wouldn't kill me, and it kinda grew from there :)

Had the experience a couple times, that how someone reacts to getting killed, can make all the difference.

Watched in side where people apologized for the misunderstanding and guarded the corpse until the victim was back.

It's kinda funny to read a conversation in side-chat, where someone apologizes for killing someone else.

My personal most annoying death was my friend mistaking "stop, I'm gettting out of the car" with "just drive over me bro"...

Death that were my own fault: Thinking it is a good decision to climb on the Tower on green mountain to see where that guy is hiding in the bushes...

Had a bullet in my head before I even knew the direction he was at... damn noob mistake back then...

[DK McWormfood 10]

I was on balota airstrip with an axe and a revolver, when a bandit comes running around. He's unarmed, so i figured i'd stay clear and loot the other end, then i realise i forgot about the shotgun in the tower. He comes around the corner, shoots, misses and i dodge him and cripple him with my axe. two more hits and he's dead. I turn around to deal with a few zeds and fucking superbambi comes sprinting across the airstrip to the bandit corpse. no communication, nothing. I was stood RIGHT F**KING THERE. i say hello thru direct chat, no response, so fuck this guy. That was my kill, those are my beans.

One axe murder and some running later i find myself in the tents on the other side, but there is a bandit with a PDW looting it. I axe-ambush him from inside a tent and continue my loot run when another bandit arrives and actually says hello. The heartbeat thing is going thru the roof, so i empty a 17-clip into him, but some glitch saves him (bloody watchtowers) and then decide to continue my axe killing spree. He's a bandit, no-one is going to miss him. plus he is laughing at me. He laughs even harder when i get smashed by the gate i tried to open. I now have a bandit, broken legs, fuck-all blood and an endless stream of Z's to deal with.

Mr Bandit thinks he's a comedian. He keeps aggro-ing the zeds and running past me. I swipe at him every now and then but am kept busy crawling around and killing the Z's. I find another 17-mag for the PDW but i am so low on blood i can't aim for shit, and i want this guy dead. He still hasnt found a weapon, so i just stand up and kill another couple of Z's and then the stupid mofo just lies down infront of me. I headshot him from about 5m away and nearly die laughing. A minute later another bandit (prob same guy) arrives but i faint as the 1st two Z's run past me and i get eaten. Possibly the dumbest sequence of deaths i have ever been involved in.

Edited March 4, 2013 by DK McWormfood

[gingerjoe 1]

Heh, 2nd time in DayZ, first time in Cherno, finally made it to the medical tents, looted awesome medical supplies, hit the parking garage on my way west, looted a hatchet, decided not to arm it, hoping people would not be threatened by it.... heard gun shots ricochet nearby, ran toward the stairs, decided that would be too slow, jumped down to the next level, bad idea. I broke my leg, and I turned toward a new noise I heard and saw a bandit with a hatchet swinging for my face. Moments later... Dead.

[The Shane Walsh of DayZ 15]

I tried to climb a rock to overlook the field we were going through and I ended up getting eaten by the rock...I was on top of it for about 3 seconds before it got hungry. First it broke my legs and then it just killed me after =(.

[dimitri3p0 99]

I was in a fire-fight in a firestation. Killed one, was playing some serious run-around games with the other, I had almost no ammo. He had a rifle, So i was getting close and moving around alot to avoid his enfield shots. I was using alt-look as I was descending the tower steps in the fire-station. then, glitched through the wall fell 20 feet to where I was knocked out then massaccred...was sorta balogna however it was pretty funny too

bahhahhaa just read the post above me about the rock. that's hilarious

[TheThrasherAsh 4]

I vaulted into a bed, and clipped through it, still all good, my friend vaulted in too, it broke my leg and I died within two seconds, everytime we saw a bed he'd always mention it, the bastard.

[nutsfathead23 2]

I vaulted into a bed, and clipped through it, still all good, my friend vaulted in too, it broke my leg and I died within two seconds, everytime we saw a bed he'd always mention it, the bastard.

yeah we had a good time in that bed lol

[PaxC4T 159]

I opened up a gate in Berizino, it pushed me, broke my legs, then zombies ate me :/

[Matteh 63]

I had no idea this thread was still going! Wow!

I vaulted into a bed, and clipped through it, still all good, my friend vaulted in too, it broke my leg and I died within two seconds, everytime we saw a bed he'd always mention it, the bastard.

Haha maybe he's just fat ;)

[The Wasteland Justicar 3]

Eh, one time I had a death on an Origins server that was kind of stupid. Decided to climb a tower. Got to the top and my character glitched off the side. I landed on a level below. Lost some blood, but no biggie I had food and I was able to defend myself. But I keep glitching and I fall two more levels. I land, broken bones and I get knocked out. Character gltiches through another level after landing and this time I fall dead at the base of the tower. Lesson learned: Do not climb towers.

[Matteh 63]

Eh, one time I had a death on an Origins server that was kind of stupid. Decided to climb a tower. Got to the top and my character glitched off the side. I landed on a level below. Lost some blood, but no biggie I had food and I was able to defend myself. But I keep glitching and I fall two more levels. I land, broken bones and I get knocked out. Character gltiches through another level after landing and this time I fall dead at the base of the tower. Lesson learned: Do not climb towers.

I remember the age old glitch where that happened pretty much everytime you climbed a ladder back when DayZ first began!

[zix 9]

Me and my friend where running along the coast after looting an industrial area. I had a hatchet and my friend had some sandbags. Then we see a bus driving along the road towards us, now my friend being... my friend he said "I got this" and started to place the sandbags down meanwhile the bus is honking its horn frantically. Wen the sandbags are down the bus rams into the sandbags and Arma being glitchy the bus went flying up in the air and we could hear the bus driver screaming in direct "WTF HAVE YOU DONE, MY BUS AHHHHH" the bus slams down on top of me and explodes killing all 3 of us.

The End

[zix 9]

Soz for double post but I have one more.

Running through Cherno on a server with 65 people on expecting to get shot in the back of the head I see a bandit I yell out "FRIENDLY SIR DON'T SHOOT" but he was a bandit, what did I expect? 2 shots in the chest but due to desync the shots proved ineffective I ran round a building and straight into the bandit. I light him up with my Enfeild he should have died but as I said, desync. He managed to break my leg and knock me out but for some reason I could still talk in direct and the timer was not showing. The bandit started dragging me and screaming "SQUEAL LIKE A PIGGEH BOI" I obliged and made pig noises. Suddenly some dude with a lee Enfeild killed the bandit and a guy with a hatchet comes around and starts looting the bandit, taking the ak74 and gear. I'm yelling out in direct "dude please help, gimme an epi pen" he keeps looting "DUDE DON'T JUST STAND THERE AND LOOT MY MURDERS BODY" but he runs away and I say "why is every one in Cherno so mean today?" and I bleed to death.

Don't trust bandits in Cherno

Edited April 8, 2013 by DefiantPie

[Matteh 63]

Me and my friend where running along the coast after looting an industrial area. I had a hatchet and my friend had some sandbags. Then we see a bus driving along the road towards us, now my friend being... my friend he said "I got this" and started to place the sandbags down meanwhile the bus is honking its horn frantically. Wen the sandbags are down the bus rams into the sandbags and Arma being glitchy the bus went flying up in the air and we could hear the bus driver screaming in direct "WTF HAVE YOU DONE, MY BUS AHHHHH" the bus slams down on top of me and explodes killing all 3 of us.

The End

That is certainly....interesting to say the least..

[Banana_Duck 121]

2 days ago I failed on an epic scale, I joined a server I hadn't been in for a while and found my self decently equipped with and Enfield ammo and food, just south of stary. I proceeded north and came across a SUV missing a wheel (which I had in my bag) fixed the car and drove off to check the gear, the SUV contained a FAL, CZ sniper, and a AKM all w

[Banana_Duck 121]

2 days ago I failed on an epic scale, I joined a server I hadn't been in for a while and found my self decently equipped with and Enfield ammo and food, just south of stary. I proceeded north and came across a SUV missing a wheel (which I had in my bag) fixed the car and drove off to check the gear, the SUV contained a FAL, CZ sniper, and a AKM all with ammo and assorted goods.

I decided that I would take the car to cherno to make a "bait car" my initial plan was to shoot a shell out and rob or kill anyone who goes near.

Arriving at cherno driving very fast through the streets, some part of me decided to park in the fire station, I have no idea why but I full throttled inside and stopped neatly with out crashing.

Once in there my common sense kicked in "why have I done this..." I'm thinking....I look to my left and see a survivor..frozen with disbelief that a car has just landed in his lap

PANIC fills up quickly, and in a matter of say 5 seconds I fumbled with the controls managing to swap seats, turn the engine off and on. Then the inevitable happened, the survivor unloads a makorov at me and I fall out the SUV knocked out, he ran over and machetted me about 20 times...and alas I died

Enjoy your prize you GIT

[Yash 1]

Spent almost 2 hours scavanging and making my way to the northwest airfield. Once I finally got there I found a car, and a crashed heli, the heli had about 6 zombies so I figured I would use a grenade, unfortunatly I only tapped the trigger button so the grenade pretty much plopped right in front of me, it was a fast painless death.

[Matteh 63]

Keep 'em coming guys!

As for me, I have an updated one from yesterday.

I was outside of Elektro, 40/50 people on the server so I knew that there was no way in hell it would be safe to go in and loot, but I was pretty much a fresh spawn, only had a Makarov but managed to find a ghillie and M4 in cherno the night before, I was in desperate need for food and drink so thought I'd risk it, get in and out asap.

I log in and instantly spot movement just off to my right, I see a group of guys 5/6 if I remember correctly.

I put my weapon in my bag and thought I would try to group up with them, they seemed organised, so with weapons holstered, I get up and walk down slowly shouting "Friendly" over mic, hoping they would take me in, but no I was gunned down by an AK.

Stoopid mistake which I will never make again.

[Dayzo 182]

The Wireworld UK server is running v1.7.7 a few weeks before the public release.

A lot of the vehicle bugs seem to have been fixed.

However, one guy was putting a wheel on a vehicle the other day.

It suddenly bounced 20 metres into the air and then landed on top of him.

Yes, it did kill him instantly. Hilarity ensued.

Edited April 14, 2013 by Anti