Confessions from a N00b!1 (share yours too)

[Cydone 41]

Most people probably woulnd't come here and confess their most emberrasing moments in Dayz. If we hear anything about extremely bambi behavior, it will not be from the noobs themselves but from witnesses. So I thought, having big enough balls to do so, that I'd share with you one act of super noobiness from my part (and my friends)

 

I have logged about 50 hours of gametime, and have not played the mod, so I was (and apparantly still am) pretty much a downright noob (read my review here).

 

A friend and me had finally got around to finding out where the good loot was, and having been looting the military base and airfield for a few days, dying, going back, dying, going back, falling, going back, and dying some more, and then finally having a succesful session, we decided to head for the coast. We had some other friends starting to play, so we thought, lets give em a good start, a gun and what not.

 

Proud like 12 year old brats with brand new (badly damaged) M4's we ran through the countryside, frivolously shooting at zombies and finally reaching the outskirts of Electrovodsks. Our biggest concern at the time was snipers, so we did try and stay out of sight somewhat, never did we think that the noobs in town could get us though, US with all this gear!? no way!

 

Only problem is, this is Dayz, there are no rules and everybody dies, and so surely enough, we would soon enough find ourselves in a situation, with no way out, and to die and fast, by the hands of a guy who was just alittle less noob than us.

 

So, just before reaching Electro there was a few houses on the side of the road and we decided to check for some food. We took one house each, not worrying about anything, and then suddently my friend doesnt answer on viscinity chat, and I get a text message on skype on my laptop "Help!". (apparently this dude had sneaked up on my friend while he was looting a can of sardines... what a way to go)

Wtf? What could happen to a dude with full gear? So what do noobs do? They rush to help their friends! Having alittle bit of wits left however, I started to make my way to the house crouching and rifle high. But just before reaching the last corner before the entrance this dude comes running around the corner with a firemans axe held high, and I shit my pants and start fireing my rifle in what I thought was directly at his body, (come to think of it I must have hit everthing else but him). *PLUNCK* and "You are dead."

WTF!!? How can I die? I have a freaking Rifle ffs, give me a break and bla bla. (to be fair I did hear him moan and groan alot, and his screen MUST have been all grey by now, but he survived the encouncer nonetheless!

 

So there you go. That is how two almost fully equiped and rifle loaded noobs got butchered by one guy with an axe.

 

Maybe it was lag, maybe it was the alpha monster, or maybe it was just very crappy aiming. Or maybe, just maybe this dude knew what he was doing, I dunno, all I know is we died, and fast.

So I respawned, found my corpse, all looted, found my friends corpse, which had everything still there but the weapons. And then almost to humiliate us more, a firemans axe on the side.

 

It is lessons like these that, although they are painfully brutal and hard to bear, do make you a slightly better survivor in the end. Every day I learn more and more about how to stay alive for longer.

 

I recall in somewhat more clarity now, my first few hours of inland adventure, meeting two fully geared dudes coming out from the woods shouting: "Stay off the roads, man!".

 

Slowly, I start to realize what they were on to!

Edited January 6, 2014 by Cydone

[razgriz93@gmail.com 228]

I serverhopped in the wrecked ship.

I got sent to explore space.

I throughly deserved it.

[DemonGroover 8836]

Nice one.

 

Experience is how you learn.

[Window Licker 504]

Yeah I just about got murdered by a guy with a fire extuingisher, in my infinate wisdom went back into Electro used my last few rounds on some Zombies climbed on the roof of a building to have a sniper start using me for target practice.  Then start getting attacked by some guy using only his fists trying to dodge bullets while getting punched... It all was too much I saw a section of roof that I hoped would have no ladder to if and jumped hoping the fall would kill me leaving my (empty) gun out of reach. 

 

I don't think I'm going back to electro unless I spawn there..

[StayAlive (DayZ) 169]

Dropped bandage to a person to use. Made him drop what was left of it. Went to close to him picking it up and got smashed in the face by his fire axe. Then i ran while bleeding to increase my distant, only to find out i was to close to pull my pistol. I died and learned the hard way never to get to close to ANYONE.

Edited January 6, 2014 by StayAlive

[koffiekip42 11]

Made a huge mistake to travel on the road from Balota to Solni. Had to pick my little brother up there and give him some of my supplies. No troubles in Cherno, just some zombies (even with a nice m4 i didn't take em out). Out of Cherno i met some guys who ran into Cherno (no problems so far). Traveld further just to get shot somewhere near the Pik Kozlova mountain area.

 

Never i'll make this mistake again.

[ninjan777 104]

I have fallen off the shipwreck, some shitty little building and the stairs in the black rock castle so 33% of my deaths now consists of me falling, I will never learn. Also i logged off at the top of the green mountain tower so some weird stuff happend when i logged in (saw a copy of myself in front of me, ran away and still died at a corner mysteriously), i mean that place is haunted for real.

[D. Deurknop 0]

Saw two fully geared  guys walking in Elektro. I was a fresh spawn, and decided to test out my fists. 1 guy entered a small house. I followed him, knocked him out and took his gear. While I was looting his body, his friend showed up in the doorway. He shot at me but missed, and then he ran out of the house. I took the back exit, ran around the house, saw the guy running around and I shot him.

It was actually quite sad, because it looked like these guys were alive for quite a while, seeing all the stuff they were carying along.

[ClassifyLP 61]

Jumped off different heights to test the "broken limbs" height... I died the first fall. >.>

 

Ran across the open field between Zeleno and Green Mountain... my friend got killed, but hey... I survived.

[GoldenKade 73]

I'm on my way to the military base nearby Stary Sobor and under the NW airfield and it's pitch black. I have brightness and gamma turned all of the way up and as I enter the base, the only thing I can make out is some building. Magnum drawn, I open the door to the building (which happens to be barracks) and crawl into the rooms. Not much is in there but just as I leave the last room some guy walks in and shoots all 6 shots of his magnum at me. They all miss - I figure he must've just been a little rattled. He ran outside and I type, "I'm friendly no need to shoot." I've moved myself into a room in the barracks and awaited his reply. 

He replied by shooting me through the window.

You are dead.

 

Moral of the lesson, trust nobody who doesn't say anything and if they shoot at you, blow their head off.

[Hosty 647]

Not really embarrassing but thought I'd share it.

 

So I went to Elektro with a friend, we both were ready to rumble with some bandits.

 

Both armed with some deadly fire extinguishers, we find 2 other dudes, with two fire extinguishers.

 

We fight, but we had the advantage as we caught them by surprise and their health looked pretty low since they died way quicker than us.

 

We won, got their puny little masks and bandanas as a trophy, but we were low health-ish since all that bleeding.

 

As we bandaged in the school (this brawl took out right in front of the school), some dude came in and punched us both in the head and we died.

 

WORTH IT

[Dedcell 4]

Derp'd over the side of the ship at rify...(Jumping from the bow, yea. just to prove that I knew how,yea..)
It was my third spawn ever in the standalone and went to check the ship out with my friend.
He glitched through the floor into an non accessible part of the ship and got an admin reset message (he raged and went off)

I went to the bottom of the ship to log out for the night not wanting to spawn through the floor or some shit (well i tried to...)
came out of the captains bit and walked the plank off the side of the ship.. tried logging out mid-air and shit.. spawned at sol the next day, ran my ass off back to the ship and no joke the ship apologized... Right at the very same bit of railing I managed to walk myself through, the beauty of a ship spawned me another mosin
I want to say win win but its really not a win win  is it? More like a Fuck you, Okay I'm sorry have your tears/beans back.
I cry beans.

[mr-mesi 2]

First time playing. Went to Balota airfield with my friends, got a lot of loot and good gear. Decided to stop playing and went to a town near Balota to fill up my backpack with food and water before leaving. Drank myself full at the well and logged off. The next day when I logged in, I got yelled at in russian and heard 2 shots and I was dead. I had logged off next to the well and spawned between a squad of 4 russian dudes, who probably shat their pants when they saw me. The sad thing was the fact that I did not even have textures appear before I got shot. 
So here's a lesson for you beginners, do not log off at a place where there might be players. After that I have always moved to a safe location like a bush or a more dense forest. 

[stolenbanjos 110]

Drank alcohol on accident instead of applying to wounds...I got sick and had no charcoal tabs. Started to head for the hospital in Berezino and got ghosted on and shot in the back before I got off the ship. Cascading failures.

[GpB311 236]

The first time I ran into another player, it was a girl who sounded like she should be on Flight of the Conchords due to her New Zealand sounding accent. She seemed really friendly and talkative, so we ran up the coast to a nearby town neither of us knew the name of.

I ran into one house and she ran off elsewhere.  I hadnt seen any other players or zombies as we ran into town, so I was foolishly focused on finding food instead of watching my own ass.  I walk down a stairwell to leave a house after finding some cereal and as I open the door,  that same girl is waiting and starts trying to club me to death with a crowbar.  (She even took the time to yell "suck it" into the mic...very lady like)  She hit me once, but I didnt get knocked out, (thank you motorcycle helmet) so I backed away pulling out my axe and managed to bury it into her skull. 

I have to admit it was a lucky shot, but she was dead and I was stil standing.  And despite its childishness and the fact noone else was around to even see it, I teabagged the bitch.

 

[krankiez 1]

Day 1... I keeped running to i found a big city and 4 bandits choose to strip me down and leave me there for 30 mins then headshot me

 

Day 2... finally found some gear and got killed by punches

 

Day 3... Ran north after reading forum and fell of the edge of a building

 

day 4... got pro and got killed

 

day 5... respawn :rolleyes:

Edited January 6, 2014 by krankie

[muddyraccoon 176]

I only mention this because the exploit had been removed, but a similar case of "poor log-out-spot choice."

After a long day of looting mostly worthless junk and no bags in Elektro, I think of the brilliant plan of logging out in an area where, if I can log in early enough I will be in the prime spot to get geared up. Top of the prison tower? I've got to be the only person to think of that!

As I soon found out, no, I wasn't the only one. When signing on I e my server's pop is oddly high for 4am. 22 people? Crap! My loot! So I hop on my server, and I come in the middle of an ongoing conversation. I'm instantly terrified. Then I hear "fine, stay in there but there are 6 of us and we'll get you both." that's when I hear the sound of feet running up the towers metal stairs.

After all this, which took 10 seconds maybe, my screen loads. 3 men with gas masks are far below, but are definitely looking my way. "another guy on the top floor." the footsteps stop. All is silent and tense. One guy starts taking pot shots at me from the ground. My heart stops, then starts again in double tempo. I forget what I'm doing here in this dead end and just run in the only direction I can; down, towards others. The first four down I see the 2 that were initially in the hot seat vanish. The next floor down I hear multiple boots running a getting closer. As I stand, frozen in terror at the idea losing my one pristine can of sardines and my flashlight, I notice the arrow symbol for ladders. I click, and I'm telephoned outside, on a ladder. Then I hear a gunshot, hear some cussing about my exploitive nature (all very negative and graphic) and then one more shot to turn my screen black. You Are Dead.

[Cydone 41]

There is nothing like running out of a military or airfield building like a noob and being shot in the doorway. Apparantly its almost impossible for me to learn, to stop and check before I leave the building.

[mzltv 2281]

My second interaction in DayZ after public release was handcuffing a man, taking his weapon and executing him - followed by shooting the person from my first interaction in DayZ. All in all, felt prettty terrible about that.

[Slite 7]

Got DCd at the Balota airstrip, logged back on an got shot in the face by some dude that most likelygot taken by surprise :)

[zabrilla 6]

I got the SA game a couple of days ago, and wow I have played nothing else since. I have died a few times, shot in the back of the head, ran out of water, fire axed but managed to get a hold on things and made my way from my spawn point on the east coast, over to a Militery installaition where I spent a couple of days and then onwards to the large Airport where I was completley on my own and managed to pick up all of the decent item spawns. I had full camo gear, an M4 with a few upgrades (not the silencer), a load of ammo, hand gun, defrib, green large backpack. I looked like I had been playing for years. I ran back down to the east coast, the plan was to help new spawns by shooting Bandits but I noticed that I was being followed by someone as well speced as me. So I ran on into a House, up to the upstairs window and engaged in a firefight with my follower. I shot once in the body, then I was shot twice, once in my chest and once in my head. Dead!

 

Ugh, I have never played Arma 2 so maybe I need to learn how to shoot in this game haha!

[Daemonkid 493]

" And despite its childishness and the fact noone else was around to even see it, I teabagged the bitch."

That's so great. That is sososososo great.

 

 

 

[Master V 8]

this is the last time i played a normal pvp server but it was a funny event.

so i was walking along trying to find people to help as i heard talking in the distance near the back of elecktro so i investigate, as i peak around the corner i see 2 guys and one undressed guy in cuffs, suddenly 1 guy pulls out some bleach in his hands and walks to his prisoner now at this point ive peeked around and about to blow his brains out till suddenly he starts drinking the bleach by accident (i don't think he knew how to cancel actions) laughing my ass off i shoot his friend bang bang  he drops dead the other guy goes for his pistol i put 1 in his leg then run up to cuff him before he draws on me i remove his gun and tell him "move you die" he seems to have a bit of sense so he lays there like a good boy, while i un cuff their prisoner. the prisoner is all happy and thank full and he wants some payback so i give him the gun and patch him up, i say my good byes and leave the two of them to settle it.... i heard no shots in the distance but i hope that poor prisoner guy got some justice out of whatever painful torture he caused the raider.

 

moral is if you hurt innocent people in anyway i will find you and i will kill you or leave you to your victims punishment oh and if your a noob and for some reason you start drinking bleach just click 2 times to cancel    

[PiLLZ 55]

i was standing out in the open on a server with 6 ppl in it, in the town next to the airfield, doing what, adjusting my visual settings, just standing there out in the open with full gear and guns and axe, had a ton of stuff, next thing i know, loud BOOM, im assuming i was shot in the head since i was immediately dead, and then i heard him going through my stuff (that hurt a little) so lesson learned, dont stand in the open for too long or you might get shot in the head , by the way ive only been playing for about 7 hours.

[Monkeyinmy Bum 0]

One of my first lives I thought it would be funny to run around with a rotten banana in my hands...didn't have anything else...

 

it was pretty funny, until I accidentally ate it by hitting "interact"..while trying to open a door.

 

Found banana, accidentally ate it, got sick, died.

 

DayZ bambi for the win!