rbro1987@gmail.com 16 Posted July 13, 2012 Guys, it's Hoffies. You're the DayZ community so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some beanbangers in the Cherno apartments, uh some weaponless noobs on the coast maybe 5 or 10 um a survivor I met at Kamenko. I left him in a parking lot behind some gas station. I killed Jonathan, my old steamfriend, with a lee einfield, and some guy uh some faggot with an Alice pack last week. I killed another guy with a revolver; I had to, he almost got away and uh someone else I can't remember maybe a girl? but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with a hatchet to the face, his body is being eaten by zombies in Electro. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've murdered maybe 20 survivors, maybe 40. I have Fraps vids of a lot of it, uh some of the guys have seen the vids. I even, um... I ate some of their beans, and tried to cook one guy's meat. Tonight I, uh, I just had to murder a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So if you read this, I may show up in LA 1, so you know, keep your eyes open. 7 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Quagmire (DayZ) 119 Posted July 13, 2012 So you've killed a lot of people and not learned a lot about paragraphs?I'd put the game down and pick up a book. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
zHDFXz 1 Posted July 13, 2012 So you've killed a lot of people and not learned a lot about paragraphs?I'd put the game down and pick up a book.looolso true Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ankhenaten 111 Posted July 13, 2012 How can i reach these kidzzzz :lol: 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
johnnyglitter 13 Posted July 13, 2012 Clearly an American Psycho reference, Liked it! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Samsquanch (DayZ) 8 Posted July 13, 2012 Decent read, but please use proper spacing next time for a more enjoyable read. The amount of people on these forums that can't produce proper paragraphs is astounding. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Whattteva 32 Posted July 13, 2012 (edited) Shouldn't be that astounding. I mean, come on, the US college graduation rate is something like 30%'ish (I'm assuming he's from US). Can you really expect that much from a population that has that kind of stat?You do have to give him credit though. At least, there are some punctuations. I've seen things like a giant paragraph with only one sentence in it. Edited July 13, 2012 by Whattteva Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rbro1987@gmail.com 16 Posted July 13, 2012 It's a movie quote you duds; it isn't intended to be split into paragraphs. He just blurts it straight out in the film. In fact I ripped it straight off IMDB and edited it slightly. Jesus Christ. You guessed that I'm American (I'm not) so I'll reciprocate: You're German (or some boring nondescript European country nobody cares about like Holland), because of the anal-retentive grammar Nazism, the blatant insecurity and resulting need to feel better about yourselves, the "herp derp Americuhhh" comments, the lack of pop culture knowledge and painful overuse of commas in your sentences.Give me your names and favourite servers and I will hunt every single one of you down and axe you in the face, except for johnnyglitter 'cause he's cool. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pieflavor 38 Posted July 13, 2012 It's a movie quote you duds; it isn't intended to be split into paragraphs. He just blurts it straight out in the film. In fact I ripped it straight off IMDB and edited it slightly. Jesus Christ. You guessed that I'm American (I'm not) so I'll reciprocate: You're German (or some boring nondescript European country nobody cares about like Holland), because of the anal-retentive grammar Nazism, the blatant insecurity and resulting need to feel better about yourselves, the "herp derp Americuhhh" comments, the lack of pop culture knowledge and painful overuse of commas in your sentences.Give me your names and favourite servers and I will hunt every single one of you down and axe you in the face, except for johnnyglitter 'cause he's cool.you care too much about what total strangers say about you... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
thetamsen 57 Posted July 13, 2012 It's a movie quote you duds; it isn't intended to be split into paragraphs. He just blurts it straight out in the film. In fact I ripped it straight off IMDB and edited it slightly. Jesus Christ. You guessed that I'm American (I'm not) so I'll reciprocate: You're German (or some boring nondescript European country nobody cares about like Holland), because of the anal-retentive grammar Nazism, the blatant insecurity and resulting need to feel better about yourselves, the "herp derp Americuhhh" comments, the lack of pop culture knowledge and painful overuse of commas in your sentences.Give me your names and favourite servers and I will hunt every single one of you down and axe you in the face, except for johnnyglitter 'cause he's cool.I'll hunt them with you by my side. >:} Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dallas 5195 Posted July 13, 2012 Good morning Hoffies. In less than an hour, aircraft from here will join others from around the world. And you will be launching the largest aerial battle in the history of mankind. "Mankind." That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can't be consumed by our petty differences anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it's fate that today is the Fourth of July, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom... Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution... but from annihilation. We are fighting for our right to live. To exist. And should we win the day, the Fourth of July will no longer be known as an American holiday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: "We will not go quietly into the night!" We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on! We're going to survive! Today we celebrate our Independence Day![crowd cheers] 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
johnnyglitter 13 Posted July 17, 2012 It's a movie quote you duds; it isn't intended to be split into paragraphs. He just blurts it straight out in the film. In fact I ripped it straight off IMDB and edited it slightly. Jesus Christ. You guessed that I'm American (I'm not) so I'll reciprocate: You're German (or some boring nondescript European country nobody cares about like Holland), because of the anal-retentive grammar Nazism, the blatant insecurity and resulting need to feel better about yourselves, the "herp derp Americuhhh" comments, the lack of pop culture knowledge and painful overuse of commas in your sentences.Give me your names and favourite servers and I will hunt every single one of you down and axe you in the face, except for johnnyglitter 'cause he's cool.Well... if i get a reservation at Dorsia, you'll HAVE to come after me with the axe. *Thinking about changing my name to Paul Allen* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
velyse (DayZ) 22 Posted July 17, 2012 Well... if i get a reservation at Dorsia, you'll HAVE to come after me with the axe. *Thinking about changing my name to Paul Allen*I also feel the need to rename my character to Paul Allen Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kentk94 194 Posted July 17, 2012 (edited) In '87, Huey released this, Fore, their most accomplished album. I think their undisputed masterpiece is "Hip to be Square", a song so catchy, most people probably don't listen to the lyrics. But they should, because it's not just about the pleasures of conformity, and the importance of trends, it's also a personal statement about the band itself. Edited July 17, 2012 by kentk94 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BNZ Solid Snake 9 Posted July 17, 2012 American Psycho parody FTW. Best thread ever. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BigEyeGuy 0 Posted July 17, 2012 Hey Hoffies buddy!you crack me up, I love that prank thread you started yesterdayCan you do lunch at Zelnogorsk tomorrow? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites