Patch Notes you never want to see

[RpTheHotrod 1]

Feel free to add your own!

- Military Cleanup: If a city becomes overpopulated with zombies, there is a chance that a 5 minute warning is declared throughout the city. After 5 minutes, the military bombards the city, killing anything that happens to be in the city at the time of bombardment.

- Added nerves meter. The nerves meter depletes the longer you stay around zombies. Once fully depleted, your character goes into a state of panic and breaths loudly and all movement controls are reversed. Nerves refills itself if away from zombies.

- Added "Slap" option. If a survivor mousewheels while within "activate" mode of a survivor who is panicking, they can slap the survivor and instantly refill their nerves.

- Progression System: Once every 4 hours, you can freshly (new character) spawn at any city you have visited in the past 24 hours.

- Removed losing gear while swimming. In its place, wearing too much gear will weigh you down where you simply drown.

- Added Weapon Maintenance: Items degrade over time and must be repaired by a survivor. The lower the degradation, the higher the chance that a gun will jam. A jammed gun requires 10 seconds of downtime to clear the jam.

- Added /dance command

- Grass grows one foot in height after an hour passes after rainfall. Maximum grass height is 5 feet

- Added lawnmower: Reduces the height of grass to default height. Lawnmowers may need toolkits before they are able to start. Lawnmowers also require gasoline.

[gunthology 0]

pistol being removed ...oh wait

" They tried to make the game more realistic , go back to COD "

yeah proning for 20+min around zombies is so much fun ITS SO REAL ITS BORING

[Blippy 26]

These are changes that you'd never want to see because only an idiot would even think of implementing that stuff.

Here's one that's pretty much universally agreed on:

[FIXED]Infected cannot run in buildings. (They can run inside them now)

[SupWithThat 2]

Changelog:

* [NEW] Removed Battleye support

[nomorechillies 11]

i like the SLAP option, wish i could just slap my clannies for fun sometimes

[SystemiK 366]

Changelog:

[new] Due to popular demand on the forums......

[Elias (DayZ) 57]

[NEW] 30% chance that player spawns with a respiratory disease (-75% stamina);

[NEW] All players spawn with two broken legs and no morphine;

[NEW] 40% chance the player will panic when seeing a Zed. Player will curl up in a fetal position and cry until all Zed have left.

[TheGoldElite 0]

What you honestly mean is "Here are my suggestions".

I only agree that we need a dance command

[RpTheHotrod 1]

No, I actually mean what my title says...patch notes you never want to see.

[septuscap 42]

pistol being removed ...oh wait

[Robert512 12]

Feel free to add your own!

- Added lawnmower: Reduces the height of grass to default height. Lawnmowers may need toolkits before they are able to start. Lawnmowers also require gasoline.

- Advanced Lawnmower simulator 2.0, now with Zeds and weapons.

Duncan, what have you done?!

[Ghandi 0]

- Military Cleanup: If a city becomes overpopulated with zombies' date=' there is a chance that a 5 minute warning is declared throughout the city. After 5 minutes, the military bombards the city, killing anything that happens to be in the city at the time of bombardment.

[/quote']

We have this already, most people call them hackers.

[t3sla 0]

[NEW] Added hats

*Shiver*

[clodan 0]

what about sex? would it refill the nerves meter?

[evoxtom 142]

[NEW] Umbrella has unleashed Nemesis in every town on the map

[TJBain 40]

My idea's

The gaming community actually gets over itself and remembers people think most of them are sad virgins and games are just basically glorified toys.

This game will ruin itself due to the community being full of prick that think this game is SOOO important..

The game is only as good as the engine, and the arma engine is buggier than 90's PC game Hidden & Dangerous.

Being playing for about a week, and I think its nothing more than a curiosity..

Knife/axe can cut down branches for make shift weapons.

Also with branches and maybe found cord/string bows can be made.

[rokenx2 1]

i have a few lemmi think...

-[new] introducing Obama healthcare

-[new] you gain bonus points you can trade in for beans if you kill survivors

-[new] mutant zombies

-[new] zombie dogs

-[new] zombie rabbis to be fair to non christian players

-[new] zombie Nazi re enactors (special they also chase zombie rabbis for survivors amusement)

-[new] matrix style bullet time slow motion button added for those sticky situations

-[new] billy mayze zombie somtimes drops shamwows to clean blood effects off survivors

-[new] stores you can buy stuff with worthless paper currency

-[fix] zombies can now run faster then you

-[new] eating too much will make you fat making zombies more attracted to you and you run slower .. also fat players wear a new custom skin that has a shirt that says (bandit target on them and it has a red crosshair)

-[new] added Pokemon cards for those bored survivors

ill keep thinking about more... this is a fun thread...

[DemonGroover 8836]

[NEW] Cannot be shot by another player (lets all be friends people)

[bad_mojo (DayZ) 1204]

[NEW] Groups added

[NEW] Friendly fire disabled

[NEW] PVP removed

[NEW] Safe zones

[sunnz 24]

zombies can still run fast inside houses

Increased zombie hearing and vision

[strayshadow 81]

-[new] All boats now spawn in Willow Lake.

-[fix] fires cause damage to players sitting on them.

-[fix] Elvis spawn rate increased from 0.0000001% to 0.000001%

-[new] Siphon fuel from vehicles into jerrycans.

-[new] Zombies attack and eat wild animals.

-[fixed] Zombie spawn radius set to 122km of city (your forests ain't safe no more!!!!).

-[new] players can push cars.

-[new] New player class added!!

-[new] Game achievements added!!!!111oneelevenonehundredandeleven

[guynumber7 1]

NEW: everyone spawns with m4a1 cco sd

[DemonGroover 8836]

[FIXED] Zombies now Romero-ed (Speed reduced to slow shamble of 0.1 mph)

[NEW] XP awarded for zombie kills

[fml 29]

" They tried to make the game more realistic ' date=' go back to COD "

yeah proning for 20+min around zombies is so much fun ITS SO REAL ITS BORING

[/quote']

agreed I think they had it right in 1.7

[adanteh 2]

[FIXED]Zombies can now run inside buildings

[FIXED]More efficient GPU memory usage. Default view distance is now 9001.

[NEW]Added MK17 Sniper SD

[NEW]You can no longer place cars in forest to reduce hoarding

[FIXED]Epi-pens now revive players as intended

[FIXED]Water bottles are now used to wake up unconscious players