DanielTy88 133 Posted October 19, 2012 (edited) Well I want to here some of the communities best DayZ related jokes. This is for pure lolz and entertainment.I will start it off with a couple I thought of.Knock Knock....Who's there?....Not a bandit!....Not a bandit who?....Not a bandit that's about to shoot you in the face...Ok come in...-.-DayZ...Where the unexpected is expected...If you kill a player in the woods does it make a sound....You bet your ass it does!Hopefully you guys have better jokes than my cheesy one's.lol Edited October 19, 2012 by DanielTy88 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted October 19, 2012 How many spawns does it take to get to kamyshovo?Only one who figures out he is in komorovo 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Fraggle (DayZ) 15720 Posted October 19, 2012 Knock knock.Who's there?Bandit guy.Bandit guy who?Just gimme your fucking beans and shut up pretending you can lock doors. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DanielTy88 133 Posted October 19, 2012 DayZ...Brings the best out of people... 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
brachra 112 Posted October 19, 2012 Knock knock.....Whos there? Respawn.....Respawn who??? Respawn you! *bandit shoots you in head* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mandalore (DayZ) 76 Posted October 19, 2012 Don't let the door hit you in the ass kill you. 8 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chakijz 174 Posted October 19, 2012 Similar as Mandalore's:Welcome to DayZ! Don't let the door break your legs on the way in...or out. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CNasty 19 Posted October 19, 2012 DayZ joke?"Friendly in Cherno!" 11 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SP45M 240 Posted October 19, 2012 Survivor walks into a bar, godmode bartender teleports to him then drops him from the sky. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dancing.Russian.Man 1631 Posted October 19, 2012 Hey, I just shot you.And this is crazy.But here's my Blood Pack,So heal me, maybe? 8 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dragonkatol 135 Posted October 19, 2012 Why did the survivor cross the road?To get to the otheOMGZOMBIESHELPHELHPEHLPEP 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mzltv 2281 Posted October 19, 2012 A survivor from Balota is running through a forest, and meets a survivor from Gorka.Balota Survivor: "Как вы думаете кто-то в твоей?"Gorka Survivor: "Я не думаю так. Каждый знает, что американцы не могут прочитать русский язык"Balota Survivor: "Это действительно так. Сделал я когда-либо говорю Вам, что Вы имеете красивые глаза?"Gorka Survivor: "Да. Да Вы имеете."Hahaha! Gets me everytime. I'm here all week, folks! 8 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michaelvoodoo25 3120 Posted October 19, 2012 "Friendly?" 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rsthoth 11 Posted October 19, 2012 Knock knock, who's there? Kamenka bridge, Kamnkea bridge who? Kamenka bridge you just killed yourself on again because you spawned here again. 2 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
a_typical_noob 651 Posted October 19, 2012 (edited) What's the difference between a hacker and a turd?Turds don't have neck beards or live in their mom's basement. Edited October 19, 2012 by A_Typical_Noob 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tyronk2@hotmail.com 36 Posted October 19, 2012 I once shot down a chopper with a Makarov...The video should be up any day now 7 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
coolcow 1 Posted October 19, 2012 I once shot down a chopper with a Makarov...The video should be up any day nowVery nice one !!! xD Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ZomboWTF 527 Posted October 19, 2012 "Knock knock"*Opens door**crack*-Guest was killed 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DanielTy88 133 Posted October 19, 2012 apache25 = I have a great idea for DayZ.... 4 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kebman 213 Posted October 20, 2012 (edited) Zombies... They sound just like when I barf. I make the strangest sounds when I barf... Edited October 20, 2012 by kebman 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kebman 213 Posted October 20, 2012 (edited) DayZ: Jogging simulator.Where do zombies get food? The monstore.How do bandits find survivors in the woods? By listening to the tree bark.You know you've played too much DayZ when you:...store all your stuff in a tent...hoard any kind of canned food...totally freak out if you find a box of Mountain Dew in your fridgeI see living people... who should be dead...I asked a bandit what he fealt when killing fresh spawns. He answered, "Recoil".Edit: Oh, I got drunk and fell asleep at the beach the other day. When I woke up, I totally freaked out. Edited October 20, 2012 by kebman 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
drbigtoe 13 Posted October 20, 2012 Any friendlies in Cherno? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tommes 331 Posted October 20, 2012 "Friendly?""Friendly!" Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DanielTy88 133 Posted October 20, 2012 "Friendly!" Shoots both in face... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dallas 5195 Posted October 20, 2012 "Pull my finger..."*Shoots newbie in the face* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
