What a day I'm having

[bfisher 561]

So some jerk nukes the server I'm on, killing everyone. Especially annoying because I'm still loaded up with NV goggles, rangefinder binocs, an M4 (which I can never find), silenced pistol (which I had just used to assassinate a pig with a double tap to the head) and a do it yourself meat kit (ax, knife, matches). Fine.

So at first I think I'll just respawn and go find my body and collect my shit. Except I had no idea where I was when I died other than some massive field a few klicks from Stary Sobor. And of course I respawn in K-town, the furthest possible point away. Whatever. I'll stock up in Balota and Cherno and head up that way anyway since what else do I have to do?

In my carelessless, I get killed by zombies in some random shithole north of Cherno. Because I just HAVE to have that can of beans. Mmmm...soo freakin good. At least now I'm in Elektro and was able to get back and recover my cache of exotic weapons - an assortment of mismatched AKs and ammo since Mr. Kalishkanov can't decide on a single freakin caliber.

I finally make it to Stary, having long given up my dream finding my old body with the NV goggles (and I think I changed servers too). I'm about to light up these zombie jerks at the army base in hopes of finding new toys when in horror I start doing the "throw road flare" animation. Dead.

This time I straight up sprint from the coast all the way to Stary, right down the middle of the road. Come and get me snipers! Zombies! Anyone with a weapon! Enjoy a hardy breakfast at the supermarket. Spend 15 minutes running around the aisles trapped by a zombie who warped through the door. Finally I give him some face time with sweet lady hatchet, but not before he fucks my shit up. I collect my shit at the army base and head for the hills. I did find a castle on the way, which was sort of cool.

At some point I find a camp north of Stary. No sense letting all that cooked meat and M1911 ammo go to waste. I also kill a rabit.

Finally I get some time to relax and cook myself a nice meal of rabbit and get my health back. No sooner do I put the fire out do I see some clown sneaking around behind me. "Friendly!" I shout, as I fire a burst from one of my AKs. Spend the next minutes running around but no sign of the interloper and no more shots fired.

I guess that's about it. I did see some guy racing around on a motorcycle but he was like a mile away. And I used half my ammo trying to investigate a heliicopter crash that had jack shit in it.

[RogueOne 112]

Sounds like a typical day at Camp Zed.

[sarkasm0 109]

Besides the nuking, I dont see anything particularly bad, you're just playing the game dude and at least you get to have some "excitement" instead of getting 1 shot killed by some DMR in the middle of the night.

[merrfack 90]

Land mines are a bastard = Nukes

[Gavalin 90]

Besides the nuking, I dont see anything particularly bad, you're just playing the game dude and at least you get to have some "excitement" instead of getting 1 shot killed by some DMR in the middle of the night.

Yea. I have to agree here. I deal with hackers mentally better then them folks that play one handed in the hills with a sniper rifle getting hard over head shots for not reason then to just cap a bitch. As of now half the hackers that have killed me have given me my shit back so...the only real grudge I hold is those ghosting bastards and guys the put one in people's dome then never go check the body.

[bfisher 561]

Oh and it gets worse!

I make it to the NW Airfield and it's a bonanza of weapons (and zombies of course). Except I'm low on blood and starving! I'm getting more and more desperate and just start running around the base like a madman trying to find a can of beans or something to eat! I CAN'T EAT AK ROUNDS AND BANDAGES! The whole base goes agro and I'm like FUCK YOU BITCHES!! GIVE ME SOME FOOD!! I'm killing zombies because I'm made of ammo at this point. Then all of a sudden I come across an M16 with the 203 attachment. Fuck this! If I'm going out, at least I'm going out Tony Montana style! SEY ELLO TO MY LITTLE FRIEND!

A zombie hits me and I light his ass up. But now I can barely see, the food icon is flashing and there isn't jack shit in this base that can be ate. So to hell with it! I make a run north for the nearest town. I can't see shit. I can't even read the compass. All of a sudden I see a shape moving in the distance. A cow! COWS MEAN MEAT! I start sprinting at this cow, just pausing long enough to fire full auto bursts at it! Mooo motherfucker! POP POP POP! Moooooo!! HAHAHAHAHA!! POP POP!! MWUHAHAHA!!

I'm almost dead so I start dropping everything. Painkillers. Smoke grenades. Whatever. Just to make room for all the meat and wood I'll need.

I can't believe I ate the whole thing in one sitting!

[RogueOne 112]

lol, good stuff

[smore98 225]

You sir...

...you are quite the barbarian of food, but I respect your decision, I wouldn't really mind my table manners if I were starving to the brink of death.

Anyway, conserve ammo, stay low, aim for the head, and make quick sprints to save time.

[Gavalin 90]

! Mooo motherfucker! POP POP POP! Moooooo!! HAHAHAHAHA!! POP POP!! MWUHAHAHA!!

I can't believe I ate the whole thing in one sitting!

I did this once with a hatchet....found nine hatchets in ... I think Kaemnka. Normally the place is nice to me but this day..holy crap. Got sniped at, hid in the town axing all the zeds. Looting them all. Half life, middle of the street surrounded by dead zombies I finally found my food...sardines...I left them on the corpse til I found some beans. Buddy of mine finally got to me so I started messing with about trading him a hatchet for this or that. Had all the hatchets laying on the ground beside my pile -o- zombies.