Another tale of Noobish Triumph

[ExtraSyllables 1]

So, I joined a game and bolted towards the woods as I normally do when i start fresh. It was your typical day, searching the blinds for gear, not getting eaten...times were good, and they were about to get better. I trudged through the woods for a bit and, much to my surprise, I found a tent! Luck be on the looter's side today! I begin to search through it, finding only some survival items: food and water. Suddenly, I hear a voice behind me, "Hey, what the fuck are you doing?"...Noob Mode Engaged... I quickly drop all his shit and turn around, "Please man, I just started and I need a few supplies...if you could spare a bottle of water and maybe some food, that'd be lovely...it's not like you dont have it to spare..." he had tons of food. Something must have touched his heart, because he gives me a bottle of water and 2 cans of food...along with a 1911 side arm and a single clip. As the gun enters my hand, my bandit's blood begins to boil... My lips curl and I begin to say..."keep an eye on your gun," he replies with a simple yup.."turn your back on no one," i respond...he turns away to gather the shit i dropped, then I take my chance. I open fire, filling his back with 5 shots, and sing at the top of my lungs "THERE'S ONLY ONE MAN YOU CAN TRUST, THAT'S A DEAD MAN!" I loot the body and run off, squealing like a little girl.

Loot:

Coyote Backpack

Ghillie Suit

Hunting Knife

Crossbow w/ 10 bolts

M1911 w/ 2 clips

Canteen

5 cans of food

Went better than expected....

the only part of this I didn't like was when I saw the crossbow and screamed, "OMG, I'm....KATNISS!"

not because I compared myself to Katniss, but because Katniss uses a fucking bow...and I call myself a fan...ugh, shame!

[Laz. 17]

beg for life,guy gives you a chance,you kill. get crossbow with 10 bolts. and FIVE cans of food!!!

[ExtraSyllables 1]

pretty much...

While I'm not one to kill just to kill, after seeing what he had, I couldn't stay my hand...

it was a marvelous conquest

[Zanki 2]

An this is why you never help anyone in this game Lawl. Hope that retard learned his lesson lol better off just shooting everyone instead of helping someone an the fag turns on you lol when you turn your back.

[Trakz (DayZ) 7]

Cool story bro?

[coleisman 15]

Big man shooting someone in the back. Quite a conquest. Do you know what they call someone who profits from doing something that anyone can do? A prostitute, or colloquially, a whore. And you must be some awfully professional and accomplished "bandit" (replete with your boiling "bandit's blood") to be wandering through the forest begging for beans and pepsi... You certainly have the world by the balls. Nations will cower at your feet O mighty conqueror of men! You will enslave them all with your m1911 service pistol and your 14 glorious rounds of .45 caliber ammunition! Enjoy your delusions. (at least you got the little girl part right)

[Muncywolverine 236]

You suck.

[Brocifer 0]

Begged like a coward for your life, he shows you mercy then you backstab him? Meh...

[Pendergast 0]

Big man shooting someone in the back. Quite a conquest. Do you know what they call someone who profits from doing something that anyone can do? A prostitute, or colloquially, a whore. And you must be some awfully professional and accomplished "bandit" (replete with your boiling "bandit's blood") to be wandering through the forest begging for beans and pepsi... You certainly have the world by the balls. Nations will cower at your feet O mighty conqueror of men! You will enslave them all with your m1911 service pistol and your 14 glorious rounds of .45 caliber ammunition! Enjoy your delusions. (at least you got the little girl part right)

U Mad Bro?

[The Aquatic Land Walrus 565]

I'm the exact opposite.

Once i find some food, and a decent firearm, i will travel the world, delivering cooked meat, and soda.

I'm too lucky. I found a ALICE pack in kamenka. I deserve to die.