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thesneakyfatcat

The Shit Sync System

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Alright, for those who haven't seen my earlier suggestion asking for a shit/piss system, I strongly suggest you read it before you read this post.

http://dayzmod.com/f...iss-system-v11/

(A forum mod locked it, so any suggestions you'll just have to PM me.)

Some may say that my shit/piss system is too simple. Some may say that this doesn't pack the immersion that the DayZ team so desperately strives for. But what could be more immersive than a mod like DayZ? One that has permadeath, unforgiving mechanics, and soulless bandits too? The answer is, to sync real life into DayZ. Hear me out, when this thought crossed my mind 2 weeks ago, I admit, I laughed at myself. But for those 2 long weeks, as I lay my head down at night, I found that I couldn't stop thinking about it. It really was a great idea! I just had to post it on the forums. I thought... what is one of the most immersive things in real life? One that could be brought into DayZ? I wondered.... Shitting! That was it! To sum it up, your real life shitting will be synced to your DayZ shitting.

How? Why? You may be asking yourself.

The reason is...

Immersion

So without further ado, here is what I thought up

The Shit Sync System

1. All features of "The Shit System" apply here. (spare a few)

2. Every player of DayZ will be issued a standard, year supply box of beans.

3. Female players are exempt from this because they do not shit in real life and there is no point for them to shit in-game. (see #21 of "The Shit System" in "Shit/Piss System v1.1)

4. The players will eat at specific times (8:00 AM, 12:30 PM, and 6:00 PM) for 1 month. They cannot play DayZ at this time because this is when the syncing happens.

5. After 1 month, the DayZ Shit Syncer will know exactly when you'll shit, how long you'll shit for, what it looks like, and the weight of the shit.

6. The players will eat nothing but the beans. (This is critical for the syncing process.)

7. Players may drink but only water and only at the designated feeding times. (1 glass of water at each feeding time.)

8. Players will record when they shat, how long they shat for, the color/smell of the shit, and the weight of the shit in grams and put all the information into the DayZ Shit Syncer. (Patent pending)

9. Players will be required to take a picture of each shit so the program will know what it looks like and implement it into your DayZ gaming.

10. If you wipe your ass in real life, it doesn't necessarily mean that you'll wipe your ass in DayZ. (You still need to collect toilet paper.)

11. Same for ass infections. These are part of the game, not real life. If you have an ass infection, please go see a doctor ASAP.

12. The shit meter levels serve as a warning as to when you'll need to shit. Prepare accordingly.

13. The DayZ Shit Syncer will know when you will be constipated. Do not worry if you become constipated, it is normal and part of the system.

Final Note: I know that I am not a game designer, nor am I an expert on human anatomy. I don't even know if what I'm asking for will even be possible. But all I want is this to get implemented. Deep immersion is what DayZ needs. DayZ is my only friend. DayZ is a lot more than a friend. It is a lifestyle that I, among many others, follow. All my friends moved out and left for college. Hell, some of them even have kids, while I'm sitting here in my mom's basement, typing out my dream for a game I know will be amazing. But I know that DayZ will never leave me. It loves me for who I am and I know I'm rambling right now but I really have to get this out. I hope Rocket or another dev gets to read this as this is my only goal right now. I hope you know how amazing your game is. It stopped me from committing suicide. Thank you.

Edited by thesneakyfatcat

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the DayZ Shit Syncer will know exactly when you'll shit, how long you'll shit for, what it looks like, and the weight of the shit.

I love it :)

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You spend way to much time on these suggestions

Don't bother paying any attention to this guy. All he does is bolt around the forums insluting people by offering condescending one-liners.

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Don't bother paying any attention to this guy. All he does is bolt around the forums insluting people by offering condescending one-liners.

Yeah, I try my best to ignore haters. Thanks for understanding! :D

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weight of the shit in grams

Everybody knows that shit is weighed in Courics...

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sometimes when u get an ass infection you get diahroea and it comes out 50% quicker but attracts zombies from 150 metres and leaves a small brown trail following you for 20 meters if u dont wipe

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Don't bother paying any attention to this guy. All he does is bolt around the forums insluting people by offering condescending one-liners.

I thhought his post was priceless XD although you are right,there are too many peeps not controbuting and just condemning

seeing as the thread the OP advised us to read was locked by an admin, without having to read through his shit system, im pretty confident its a shit idea.

Although its not fair to judge so i did skim read...

4. The players will eat at specific times (8:00 AM, 12:30 PM, and 6:00 PM) for 1 month. They cannot play DayZ at this time because this is when the syncing happens.

5. After 1 month, the DayZ Shit Syncer will know exactly when you'll shit, how long you'll shit for, what it looks like, and the weight of the shit.

6. The players will eat nothing but the beans. (This is critical for the syncing process.)

IF this isnt a troll, im worried for him

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Alright, seeing as this isn't getting the best response, I will scrap this idea. Stay tuned for my next post detailing a "Menstruation System" for female players.

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