Has DayZ made you laugh out loud?

[ColdCamV 20]

>> Walking around down in Cherno with a friend like a couple fresh spawned nubcakes scoping for beans.

>> Sniper on the roof, "oh shit ninja get down!".

>> Hit the deck, look up at sniper. Not sure if spotted, or safe.

>> Sniper leans to the left, leans to the right, leans to the left, leans to the right.

>> Friend grows balls, wants to communicate with it.

>> Friend stands up, leans to the left, leans to the right, leans to the left, leans to the right.

>> Bullet drills through skull, friend falls down dead.

>> I laid there for the next ten minutes laughing IRL not giving a shit if I die or not

Leaning...the only way to communicate with the majestic sniperaes banditose

Was playing on a server running through elektro, found an m1041 and thought YES decent gun..no ammo..SH*T...ran into the next building and found a winchester with ammo but I had been picking up the ammo for the shotgun so i chucked all the ammo in my bag and left the m1041 for the winchester..bout 10 minutes later a new survivor runs past and sees me, I see hes carrying the shotgun and he says "dont shoot I have no ammo" started laughing because I had picked up majority of the rounds and their in my backpack.

Also in elektro on another occasion had a benny hill moment as I got chased (me carrying a hachet) all through the back yards of elekto jumping fences and what not being chased by a KoS'r with a makarov taking shots at me..I wasnt even near him and I saw him out of the corner of my eye and he started shooting..ran for a good 15 minutes before I lost him..by running around a corner and hitting the deck as he ran past me being chased by a conga line of zeds

[sambody 44]

Made me laugh when i found camp with 6 cars filled with obviously duped items. Then someone started to snipe me and got me down to 1k blood. Took me few minutes to get back to 12k and started to hunt that bastard down. Got behind him and emptied full mag on his back, obviously he combat logged like a fagget. Ran down to the camp and destroyed 3 vehicles, stole one. Too bad his friend got away with 2 bigger cars full of stuff.

Edited July 27, 2012 by sambody

[Convoy 5]

It felt like a nature documentary... "one fish tries to eat another fish, gets devoured by shark".

I read that with the "british accent documentary guy" voice.

"The shark gets his meal after all."

Oh dear gawd someone do a DayZ Documentary.

[The Dyne 3]

Crawl though doorway

Go into shock, no broken bones or damage, but shock

"AHH DOORWAY AHH I'M GONNA PASS OUT"

[ColdCamV 20]

Crawl though doorway

Go into shock, no broken bones or damage, but shock

"AHH DOORWAY AHH I'M GONNA PASS OUT"

Its the shock of what if I dont fit..have I put on weight? ive only been eating a diet of canned beans and pasta..OH GOD WHY AM I FAT

[slyskillz 1]

I. TURNED. INTO. A. FUCKING. COW.

[fenririv 4]

Trading shotgun salvos across the street from the Cherno apartment balconies was amusing.

[shnoogy 30]

Earlier today, I was bored running around Elektro and I saw a guy in the church. I ran up next to the wall and said over voice chat "Hey buddy, lets play a game, Ill run past the door, and you see if you can kill me". The next 8 minutes were spent with me sprinting abound the church in circles with benny hill music playing over voice chat while this guy was trying to take me out with a double barrelled shotgun everytime i ran past the door.

[shredergenetix (DayZ) 2]

Me and 2 buddies were heading westward into cherno. We see this guy running down the traintracks his character screaming like crazy. We were maybe 5 meters away from him, so we just watched as he ran by and just laughed at the situation and of how random it was. Then someone opens fire on us while we are in our lol's and my 2 friends ran away, but we had no idea where it was coming from and I didnt want to run towards the guy ya'know? So I ran around a bush in a circle frantically untill one of my friends died so me and the other guy hid in the warehouse by cherno. It was a very entertaining string of events

Edited July 27, 2012 by shredergenetix

[NFK 102]

So I was leaving Skalisty Island in a fishing boat at night. It's loud and it's slow, so I stay way off the coast to avoid any snipers as I motor my way back to my northern camp.

Of course, the server resets about half way through my journey (this is my second server reset in a boat, I'm lucky like that). I log back in, boat is gone, and I'm treading water. In the dark. And I'm freezing.

So I rotate the camera, find the north star to get my bearings, and start swimming west to shore. And swimming. And swimming. And then swimming some more. I give up on holding down the 'w' key and just jam it with a piece of folded paper. Day Z, the hardcore 'w' pushing simulator. My guy's still freezing, and now has a nasty cough too.

Just when I start to think that maybe I'm not swimming west after all, I finally catch sight of the shore, just a silhouette in the dark really. So I pull the paper to unjam the 'w' key, but I'm still swimming. Something's gone wrong, the key won't come back up. I reach the shore and now my guy is running while I try to unstick the key. He keeps coughing, and running, right past a gas station and manages to aggro some zeds. The 'w' key still won't come up. I'm half way across the field, the zeds are still on me, my guy's still coughing, my blood is slowly but surely ticking down.

Finally the key comes unstuck. I spin around and bring down the first zed, but the second gets in a hit. I pop him too, but not before (wait for it) he breaks my leg. No morphine on me, so I crawl to the tree line, log, and take a break.

Boats, man. Boats are a fucking riot.

[AutumnWolf (Ookami) 2]

Ok so me and my friends were gonna make a base at Willow Lake one of my friends finally get there and we got bored waiting for the others so we started messing around and about 2 min later we start pron jumpingish around and he does it into this little tree and well.........he dies. It was so fucking hilarious.

[MRJOEYBON 18]

We all recently respawned. Passed out in the hospital while looking for morphine and health. Friend armed with a hatchet shows up to bandage me up. Guy starts taking shots at us, misses, D/C. We're leaving the hospital right as he reconnects. Wondering on where we should go next, my friend decided to axe him the question.

[DemonGroover 8836]

I was crawling around a buidling once and i turned a corner and came face to face with a frigging chicken staring right at me. I shat myself and fired a few rounds off - i missed. Needless to say it attracted a horde and i got the You Are Dead screen shortly after.

[NFK 102]

I was crawling around a buidling once and i turned a corner and came face to face with a frigging chicken staring right at me. I shat myself and fired a few rounds off - i missed. Needless to say it attracted a horde and i got the You Are Dead screen shortly after.

"Yeah here come the rooster, yeah / You know he ain't gonna die."

[WhorrorLoLz 6]

I laugh every time I murder another player. Payback's a bitch...

[lugaru 103]

"Yeah here come the rooster, yeah / You know he ain't gonna die."

I had a little chicken related scare last night... when I'm in a group I love yelling "hey chicken, I'm friendly" to get a laugh from the other players. Well I did that last night and heard a muffled yell back (could not understand it) that was NOT a member of my group... oh man we ran!