The sound of Cannibals.

[PEACE_543 99]

Yesterday I was traveling with a man who seemed to be laughing uncontrollably. Wearing a blue armband, armed to the teeth  and not killing me on sight i thought he was a friendly.  Every couple minutes he would let out a burst of laughter. At first i thought i missed a pretty cool emote. I followed him and his acquaintance north up the coast. 

Only until i seen him kill and skin a fresh spawn it dawned on me. This man isn't an overly happy savior, but really a deranged cannibal driven mad by the flesh of his victims.
He prompted me to eat his prey. If I didn't eat that bambi I would have been chopped up right next to him. 

Stomach upset but my sanity still in tact, we proceed to Solnichnly. (Laughing all the way)  After passing by the military bunkhouse and stopping in a nearby warehouse we were engaged by a group of 4-5 other armed militants. Me, armed with only a makeshift spear, crouched behind the north door and waited for my inevitable death. The cannibals broke out of the warehouse and started firing. And I blindly followed.

*Autism Ensues* 

Needless to say Mr. Chuckles was too far gone to be of any use in combat. After running back into the warehouse he was the first to die. Meanwhile outside the warehouse. I'm undetected. No shirt and melee weapon, they must not have seen me as that much of a threat. I run back into the warehouse. Gunshots going off everywhere. This is when I find the body of our blue banded, hunger driven, friend? 

I laughed to my self and thought, at least he died happy. A gunfight still going on outside. In an attempt to save my own skin, grabbed the USG off his lifeless back and waited for the north doors to open. And my god did those men got a surprise when they did. They must have put burst fire on these things because when that door opened, the two guys behind it went down like dominoes. Not 10 seconds later another one of them came through the south doors and his fate was no different.

The gunshots dissipated but i continued to scan around for anymore threats. Unsure who i killed, what their intentions were or if they were friendly. The other person i was traveling with came back into the warehouse and surprisingly. didn't kill me. (The cannibalism hadn't corroded his mind to the point he couldn't recognize me) I clap to applaud him on our survival, when i realize i'm bleeding. While scrambling for cover and searching for something to patch myself up with, I ended up bleeding out. As far as i know my acquaintance was the only one who made it out of there alive.  

So, watch out for the mentally unstable on your travels. They don't really find your jokes funny. Also. Nobody wins in a gunfight. And next time you think about killing people remember that even a noob with a spear. (In the right place at the right time) Can send you back to the coast with nothing but a rag and a flare to your name. 

[Andyyypandyyy 76]

This gave me a laugh, I'm glad that's a thing, time to force feed my friends for the giggles aha