Rapscallions in my dwelling

[xzDIABLOzx 157]

Good day, my fellow chuckaboos. Stop your lally-gagging and nanty narking for a moment, It’s beer and skittles time.

Just enjoying another evening in dandy Chenarus and I required a reprieve from the plothering downpour, as I was coming down with a case of the morbs after what seemed to be a fortnight in the rain and darkness. I had just come apon a lockpick of rarity, so I locked up my new found dwelling apon entry and proceeded to retire upstairs for some much needed respit. Good time for a nightcap I thought, so I proceeded to wet my whistle with some tonic.

Apon lighting my glowing luminus device, I hear what sounds like a ruckus happening outside. “Definitely rowdiness” I say to myself. Sounds like ruffians out there attempting to break into my dwelling. I attempt to converse, however these gents had an armoury of delightful words and phrases with which to express themselves, one in particular had quite the Sauce-box.

"What the devil?" I say as I grab my powdered milk and Musket and proceed downstairs. I had had enough of their collie-shangles. The ruffians thought they had me in the jammiest bit of jams with their podsnappery. “Absolutely preposterous” I say to myself as I unlock my dwelling to deal with the rumpus. As I unlock my entryway, one chap attempts to advance towards me post haste. He turns out to be a foozler so I blow a golf ball sized hole through him, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because at it turned out he was quite the hornswoggler with the appearance of himself being just a torso.

I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds the man in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off the ravenous undead. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified meater rapscallion attempting to flee post haste. He Bleeds out waiting on support to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up, just as the founding fathers intended.

Edited November 28, 2018 by xzDIABLOzx

[Eadaif2 1]

What an eloquent story, many thanks!

[xzDIABLOzx 157]

3 minutes ago, Eadaif2 said:

What an eloquent story, many thanks!

Humble bow.