Maysin 3 Posted January 29, 2014 Below are a few stories that I can remember almost as if they happened just 5 minutes ago after yet another strange death in the land of Chernarus. God bless this fucked up land. Glitches and bugs abound. Glitch #1: This is my fondest memory of DayZ Standalone so far. I'm running around the south western shoreline near Kamenka I believe and I find me a nice house to raid. In a room up the stairs, a book lies upon the floor. "Oh! My lore!" I cry and examine. What do I find? The Call of Cthulu in pristine condition. The moment my eyes gaze away from the dreary cover am I greeted with a dark screen and my epitath: "You are dead." Huh. Neat. Turns out the character model I was using had inherited a high chance of heart attack. No warning, no preparation, death! Glitch #2: This happened rather recently and has since confounded my understanding of the meaning of death in DayZ. Through a serious of unfortunate lag, I find my locked and loaded badass suddenly facplanted and ass up with a large, suited meat-merc with a battle axe standing over my bleeding anus and suddenly I'm staring at "You are unconscious" ... wait... so I'm not dead? What do I do? I press ESC as a normal reaction to situations like this. Lo and behold! I see... the scene described above, except my vision is blurred and dark. I press C. I am standing up. Somehow, through sheer force of my badassary did I manage to lift myself up to stand. My assailant panics and backs away in terror. Did I just rise up as a zombie?! No, I have control and I manage to back myself up a flight of stairs and into a room full of bunk beds, the airfield visible out the busted windows just barely. My assailant finds his courage and murders me finally for I have been unable to use any items due to my being 'unconscious'. Amazing. I sleep-deathwalk. Glitch #3: I log into a server and it is night time. I flit about in the moonlight for a short moment before departing. Shortly after I find a friendly fun server for my husband to join. I begin to load in... trouble! "Please wait..." ... waiting! ... "There was a problem blahalbah character has been reset blahblah administration notified. Huh? Wut. Load up another server. New character. Hours of scavenging and looking and trekking across country to reach my husband and log out only to just NOPE. Glitch #4: I pick up a banana. It is fresh! It is pristine! So magical and glorious! I eat said banana. Server crashes. Reload into new server. I have banana! It is good banana still? Yes! I eat it. "I have a funny taste in my mouth." Wut. Banana somehow zombified through a server crash and I ate a rotten banana. These are but many more of the highly stupid nature of DayZ. This is to be expected of course, but I must ask -Why- do I torture myself? :( 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
senorrambo 22 Posted January 29, 2014 Below are a few stories that I can remember almost as if they happened just 5 minutes ago after yet another strange death in the land of Chernarus. God bless this fucked up land. Glitches and bugs abound. Glitch #1: This is my fondest memory of DayZ Standalone so far. I'm running around the south western shoreline near Kamenka I believe and I find me a nice house to raid. In a room up the stairs, a book lies upon the floor. "Oh! My lore!" I cry and examine. What do I find? The Call of Cthulu in pristine condition. The moment my eyes gaze away from the dreary cover am I greeted with a dark screen and my epitath: "You are dead." Huh. Neat. Turns out the character model I was using had inherited a high chance of heart attack. No warning, no preparation, death! Glitch #2: This happened rather recently and has since confounded my understanding of the meaning of death in DayZ. Through a serious of unfortunate lag, I find my locked and loaded badass suddenly facplanted and ass up with a large, suited meat-merc with a battle axe standing over my bleeding anus and suddenly I'm staring at "You are unconscious" ... wait... so I'm not dead? What do I do? I press ESC as a normal reaction to situations like this. Lo and behold! I see... the scene described above, except my vision is blurred and dark. I press C. I am standing up. Somehow, through sheer force of my badassary did I manage to lift myself up to stand. My assailant panics and backs away in terror. Did I just rise up as a zombie?! No, I have control and I manage to back myself up a flight of stairs and into a room full of bunk beds, the airfield visible out the busted windows just barely. My assailant finds his courage and murders me finally for I have been unable to use any items due to my being 'unconscious'. Amazing. I sleep-deathwalk. Glitch #3: I log into a server and it is night time. I flit about in the moonlight for a short moment before departing. Shortly after I find a friendly fun server for my husband to join. I begin to load in... trouble! "Please wait..." ... waiting! ... "There was a problem blahalbah character has been reset blahblah administration notified. Huh? Wut. Load up another server. New character. Hours of scavenging and looking and trekking across country to reach my husband and log out only to just NOPE. Glitch #4: I pick up a banana. It is fresh! It is pristine! So magical and glorious! I eat said banana. Server crashes. Reload into new server. I have banana! It is good banana still? Yes! I eat it. "I have a funny taste in my mouth." Wut. Banana somehow zombified through a server crash and I ate a rotten banana. These are but many more of the highly stupid nature of DayZ. This is to be expected of course, but I must ask -Why- do I torture myself? :( My personal favourite was the time I opened a gate and it apparently swung open with bone-crushing force. :D 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deathlove 2283 Posted January 29, 2014 Oh man one that really SUCKS is when your in the second floor of a 2 story house and you go to a corner and suddenly you end up flying through the wall and out onto the street plummeting down and breaking both your legs. Than you end up CRAWLING through the entire city looking for just a shirt and a pair of sticks so you can craft a splint. lol its so intense going through a zombie infested town looking for stuff crawling. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
eleventhavenue 204 Posted January 29, 2014 Oh man one that really SUCKS is when your in the second floor of a 2 story house and you go to a corner and suddenly you end up flying through the wall and out onto the street plummeting down and breaking both your legs. Than you end up CRAWLING through the entire city looking for just a shirt and a pair of sticks so you can craft a splint. lol its so intense going through a zombie infested town looking for stuff crawling. Ah, I long for the time when we will have to fear waking up the zeds again... then the noise/sight system will actually do something again.I think we all have one of these, but I'll share my ´´DayZ movement system´´ anecdote: I was on the ship south of Svetloyarsk with a few friends. I was warned that the ship was glitchy and so we all walked, and for some reason i took out my gun while moving. My character did the ´´take out gun while moving´´ animation, which always is done at jogging pace, and so I nearly sent myself off the edge of the walkway where the ship is ripped in two. Luckily the animation stopped just before I reached the end. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Maysin 3 Posted January 29, 2014 Ah, I long for the time when we will have to fear waking up the zeds again... then the noise/sight system will actually do something again.I think we all have one of these, but I'll share my ´´DayZ movement system´´ anecdote: I was on the ship south of Svetloyarsk with a few friends. I was warned that the ship was glitchy and so we all walked, and for some reason i took out my gun while moving. My character did the ´´take out gun while moving´´ animation, which always is done at jogging pace, and so I nearly sent myself off the edge of the walkway where the ship is ripped in two. Luckily the animation stopped just before I reached the end. I almost had that happen in an appartment building. Character put away weapon for whatever reason while running and I almost jumped off a balcony and into the street. Problem I have now is I have an on-going Glitch where I'm stuck under a house and seemingly cannot die by any means, not even zombie attacks or slowly of thirst. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TEST_SUBJECT_83 465 Posted January 29, 2014 Glitch 2 has happened to me a few times.It really freaks people out when the person they just murdered gets up and walks away. lol! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
