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Hikurac

Pant-less and Friendly, a story of how to not get shot at.

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Just recently my nephew came to visit and he likes to watch me play DayZ. So in order to change things up I let him play instead and told him to try as hard as he can to be friendly to others but try not to die. Thus he was killed about 5 times in the time span of one hour. He soon grew tired of the game, stating that it was impossible to meet people without getting attacked. I tried to convince him that it's easy to not get shot at. All you have to do is be entertaining. If you are more entertaining to them then a dead body full of loot, chances are they would rather you remain alive.

 

In order to prove my theory I respawned at Balota, found a nice jacket, a nifty hat, and proceeded to adventure across the coast without any pants. Here is how I looked by the time I logged off from my adventure: 

http://cloud-4.steampowered.com/ugc/505826534926746737/DBB1933CA08622B04B96ABD4124C795B6BC2DD29/(And yes I have 5 handcuffs, 4 of which I found in one firestation along with a key)

 

I jumped from low population to high population server to see if people acted any more hostile. I sang the glorious lyrics of this beautifully orchestrated music video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TQhyDYQ081U

I talked in a funny accent when I met people and stated that I was the Pant-less King of Chenarus. I told them that if they wore the mandatory Pink Hat and removed their pants, they too could join my army and bow down to me, forever basking in my eternal sea of glory.

 

Some traded with me, some gave me supplies, some even joined my magnificent army and others fled at the sight of my beautiful clean shaven legs. I traveled from Balota to Elektro, back and forth. By the end of it I had met a total 11 people (who had not ran away). None of them ever attacked me and I am still alive. Some were even bandits, as I had seen them kill bambi's on the coast. However through the use of my silver tongue and my Emperor Norton-like charm, they had become incapacitated of their hostilities.

 

Perhaps they were all friendly because I made them giggle, perhaps it was pure luck, or maybe it's because people don't want to cause harm to the guy who acts and looks the hobo at the local Denny's. I don't know. All I know is that it worked. Maybe it will work for you too.

Edited by Hikurac
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