So where the hell do I put this thing?

[SurvivorAndy 15]

EDIT: Warning, I didn't realise but my telling of this story goes on for awhile. Didn't realise until I posted it. Be prepared for a long-ish read.

 

 

 

So me and two friends all got DayZ standalone. We didn't have high hopes but we were being won over, raincoat by raincoat. When we group up in Cherno, we begin to leave and god damn if they weren't skyscrapers on the distance.

One of my friends tell us that he's been there in a past life, and the loot he'd found was pretty good. Reassured and enticed, we head there. After an exasperatingly immature game of hide and seek on the way there, we arrived. Damn, it looked cool. We run into the closest apartment block, partly because of our excitement and partly because of the phase-shifting zombie on our tails. After treating the uninvited guest to a bloody, axe-y suprise; we race through the building looking for loot. Spaghetti, aw yeah!

And then there's kind of absoloutly nothing. We look through afew more similar buildings, but we don't find anything remarkable. With nothing but a can of spaghetti and broken dreams in tow, we leave towards the airstrip - and that's when we see the hospital. Without learning any lessons from what happened mere moments ago, we scurry into the hospital expecting to find enough supplies to medicate a city. I search a room in the back while the other two scour the hospital for meds. Finding little, I finally relinquish any sense of control over my eating habits to the relentless spam of bodily patterns flooding my chat. The game tells me that my stomach rumbles violently and that I'm really hungry. I'm pretty confident that I feel none of these, but feeling peer pressured by my own body I retreat to some of the local apartment blocks we hadn't looked through. I find only a handcuff key, which is usefull as I have been carrying around a pair of handcuffs for awhile.

 

It's while I'm looking through these apartment rooms that the beginning of the end breaks loose.

"WHAT THE HELL? DUDE YOU WERE NOWHERE NEAR ME"

"I KNOW WHAT THE F*CK DUDE I DIDN'T EVEN"

"I KNOW WE WERE MILES APART"

By now I'm pretty worried and confused, so I ask my friends what the hell they're talking about. One explains to me that he accidently hit the other with his axe. I laugh, and get back to my search until:

"It wasn't your fault, it was lag or a glitch or something. I'm coming back now, I spawned in Balota"

It had totally eluded me that he could have died on the hit, and the realisation that it was a critical hit sinks in. Damn. I abandon my search and head back to my murderer-friend to keep him safe in case he's lagging, which I figure he is.

Fast forward afew minutes, and we gain the attention of a zombie. I kill it, but not before it hits my friend and gets him bleeding. While I bandage him with bits of my shirt - his is glitched and he can't - like a shark, another zombie comes.Mortally terrified of my friend's axe now, I go in to kill the zombie while he runs it around in circles; on the off chance that his player-seeking axe manages to extend itself by afew foot and take my face off. Ensuing the Benny-hill chase theme, for afew minutes I hound the zombie, each axe-swing bringing me closer to its back until I see a satisfying, physics-defying thrust in the zombie and it falls to the floor. By now, my still-bleeding friend is close to death. Yep, he tells me, he's fell unconscious.

First thing's first - I bandage him up, this time without a zombie's love-taps interrupting my work, Aw yeah, I bandage him sucessfully. I don't understand why this satisfies me so much, but I tell myself that I owned that left-click apply bandage. I owned the hell out of it.

Next step, getting him a blood transfusion or bringing him back around. I think getting him back to full health might wake him up, so I take out a first-aid kit I found and lay it out on the floor.

 

Wait, what the hell is all of this?

 

I take everything out of the first aid kit, and begin to work out the intricacies of saving a life. I see if any of the blood bags have blood in it, which they don't. I do manage to remember that on this standalone, the wrong bloodtype will kill somebody. I realise I can probably use the syrringe to take his blood sample, and I'm pretty sure I replicate the feeling of first discovering fire millions of years ago. Basically, it's good. I happilly take away the precious little blood he has, and begin staring at the needle.

 

What next?

 

My commentary - primarily "uh...uhm...wellllll..." in no way comfort my fallen friend, who asserts a conviction that he will die in my hands. Not in mine, no sir. Doctor Brown has let zero of his patients die before you, and you won't be the first. You can be the first patient, however.

I return to staring at my needle, as the second friend - victim of the rogue axe - returns and empties the contents of his old body. All geared up with some clothing and an axe, he's ready to help me in this delicate surgery. Firstly, we need to find a place to operate.

No drag body feature? Alright, plan one gone. Plan two quickly reveals itself - you can push somebody by walking into them. It's now that we begin awkwardly walking into him, in an attempt to push his still-standing unconscious form into the safety of the hospital. I entrust my friend, we'll call him JR and the sleepyhead JC, to push JC into the building. Meanwhile, I look through the rest of the place hunting down a way to find blood. I find nothing but a rotten banana, which I pocket. I believe in euthanasia, and the banana will be a dignified end for JC if the puzzle of a blood transfusion is...fruitless. Fruitless! Ha.

Finding nothing in the rest of the building, I return to find JC in a vending machine and JR trying to retrieve him. We both sit and laugh at him, while he despairs that he might as well be dead by now. Aw.

Hunkering down by JC, I get all of my available tools out. There is no hope left, so we can only pray to Lady luck that our blood types are compatible. I first try injecting his blood into myself, which I can't actually find a way to do. I then notice the empty blood bag, and have an idea. JC brb's to get a drink, and I prepare to get to work.

Then the bullets start being sprayed.

"SHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHITSHIT"

JC finally slumps to the floor - goodnight, sweet prince - and JR makes a break out of the hospital. I take a crippling amount of shots, but bring myself to run out as well.

"Where are we being shot from man?"

"SCHOOLHOUSE HE MOVED DOWN TO FIRST FLOOR"

With this information, I draw eratic lines of movement on a path to the school, taking one more bullet for my troubles. JR gets here as well, telling me he took four hits. I know I took more, but I stay quiet and bandage him. JC's dead, we're both mortally hurt. Our weapons that we toted - an empty pistol and an axe - seemed insufficient against the semi-auto horror that hurt us so badly, but we have an idea.

"JR, let me try something on you"

"Yeah sure"

I take out my handcuffs, and cuff him to see if it immediatly stops his weapon. It does. The too-good-to-be-true handcuff key that I found earlier is taken out, and I release him and turn away to ponder our next move.

 

"AB, can you release me now?"

"I did"

"No I'm still cuffed"

"Dude I used the key on you it said you were released"

"I'm really not"

"Shit."

"Shit."

I take his own pair of handcuffs from his inventory - the fight ahead now my own. As I move around to the side of the ladder, JR bursts out that he's broken free. Now without my handcuffs and my original plan to cuff him before he can kill us, I get ready to flank the gunman with no idea what to do but a pretty good blueprint for my axe meeting the base of his skull. I tell JR to cover the noise of my climbing with meaningless BS over comms, and he begins relaying why we were at the hospital in the first place and how pathetic the would-be bandit was. I manage to get to the top floor.

Did you expect me to be shot? Did you think I would close the gap, and brutally avenge JC? Would I be gunned down, and would JR take on the mantle of vengeance? It was none of these things.

 

The bandit has combat-logged. The schoolhouse is empty, he is nowhere to be found. There are no lessons to be taught from this story, no heartwarming conclusions, no great tragedies. One of us died, and the both of us are wounded beyond recovery. We are, to accuratly use the word, doomed.

The server crashed. We have decided solemly that when we return to the game, we will kill ourselves as we are too hurt to keep going. We will climb to the top of the roof and let ourselves fall, the landing hopefully finishing us off. It's more dignified than hobbling around until we're shot, or starving to death. We'll jump when we log back on.

There are no lessons to be taught from this story, no heartwarming conclusions, no great tragedies, no plot twists, no drama. It's just an ending. Just an ending, for only three people in this game of thousands. Just one set of lives.. In every essence of the game and it's purpose, it was a true DayZ ending to our story.

Edited December 31, 2013 by SurvivorAndy

[Jfiles 439]

Holy fuckload of text.

[SurvivorAndy 15]

Holy fuckload of text.

Yeah I wasn't really paying attention while I was writing it, then posted it and saw I'd wrote a damn brick.

[Vitols 3]

Good read, really liked it.

[SurvivorAndy 15]

Thanks :)

[SurvivorAndy 15]

Bump

[SurvivorAndy 15]

Out of interest, how do you actually do a blood transfusion? I'm not going to lie, we never did find out.

[SurvivorAndy 15]

^

[SurvivorAndy 15]

I guess I will never find out how to transfuse blood D:

[Angel Knight 427]

Alrighty. Blood 101.

 

First of all, the easy way. If you have a Saline Bag IV, put it in your hands, walk up, and inject him. Done. Congrats.

 

If you have a Saline Bag and an IV Start Kit, combine them in your inventory to create a Saline Bag IV and go back to the step above.

 

 

If you don't have saline, you need to extract the blood from the donor with a syringe, put it into a blood bag, combine the blood bag with an iv start kit, and then use the blood bag iv on the patient. You should also test with a blood test kit first to make sure you are compatible, as a blood transfusion with incompatible types will kill the patient. Test both donor and recipient and compare to this list: http://dayz.gamepedia.com/Blood_type

 

 

If you don't have the testing kits, your odds are about the same as Russian Roulette - so, pretty good for a typical day in Chernarus.

[AJ4211 30]

That was fucking entertaining. Shame you didn't get to find out who would win in a hand-cuff v m4 fight

[SurvivorAndy 15]

That was fucking entertaining. Shame you didn't get to find out who would win in a hand-cuff v m4 fight

Remember kids, if you can't shoot them, subdue and lynch them with your fists.