jBrick 116 Posted April 2, 2013 So, I'm a bandit, but I'm one of those bandits who do things out of a sense of fun and hilarity. I've had two favourite situations thus far related to killing other players that I think are note worthy. Now sit back and relax... because this is going to be a long post.Best Kill EverI found a dirtbike.... and then I found some random new spawn on the coast. I took him for a dirtbike ride up the side of a mountain. It was very exciting the view was amazing. I even managed to find the highest portion of the mountain and proceeded to hurl us off of it.... as we were plummeting down... I figured why ride this firey ball of death to my imminent demise and ejected. The other player didn't react fast enough. Somehow I survived with a broken leg meanwhile he blew up on my bike at the bottom of the hill. The Running JokeThere's this kid... and god is he annoying. The type of kid that spams sidechat and you have to mute VON when he's on. Well... after running with him for half of a day I got sick... sick sick sick of his talking. So I shot him in the head with a 1911 saying it was an accident. Hid the body... whole 9 yards. After him spamming the living shit out of the server for a half hour... I decided I would offer to "drive him back to his body" being that it was an accident and all. I asked him to get on the main road near his spawn (Balota). As I drove down there sidechat was lighting up with "Hey.. who has the white car in elektro." Then it was "Hey... who has the white car in Cherno". Meanwhile the little shit was badmouthing everyone on the server... so naturally when I saw him on the road I gunned it and ran his ass over. The whole server started laughing in sidechat when his death message appeared. He then proceeded to call me all kinds of nasty names. So, I managed to track him down and dust him off in elektro while he was hiding in the bushes sniping with an Enfield.... I figured he'd had enough.Fast forward to the next day... and guess who is on running his lips again. So, I sequester the assistance of another member of the server and got him to tell that little pain in the ass that he's going to come pick him up in the car he found (naturally its my damn car and I'm driving). He accepts... so my new best friend tells him to get on the main road where he is...well you guys know where this is going. I hit him so hard his body flew into a barn.... started laughing and crashed my car on rubble. The server went crazy with "HOLY SHIT YOU GOT HIM WITH THAT AGAIN???? LAWLZ" About 2 minutes later I see the same kid running near elektro got out and shot him. I haven't seen him on the server since... but he has a l33t clan that is gunning for me. I'm scared...but I think I might be able to make it out of this alive.Too be Continued.... 15 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blondedash 403 Posted April 2, 2013 So, I'm a bandit, but I'm one of those bandits who do things out of a sense of fun and hilarity. I've had two favourite situations thus far related to killing other players that I think are note worthy. Now sit back and relax... because this is going to be a long post.Best Kill EverI found a dirtbike.... and then I found some random new spawn on the coast. I took him for a dirtbike ride up the side of a mountain. It was very exciting the view was amazing. I even managed to find the highest portion of the mountain and proceeded to hurl us off of it.... as we were plummeting down... I figured why ride this firey ball of death to my imminent demise and ejected. The other player didn't react fast enough. Somehow I survived with a broken leg meanwhile he blew up on my bike at the bottom of the hill.The Running JokeThere's this kid... and god is he annoying. The type of kid that spams sidechat and you have to mute VON when he's on. Well... after running with him for half of a day I got sick... sick sick sick of his talking. So I shot him in the head with a 1911 saying it was an accident. Hid the body... whole 9 yards. After him spamming the living shit out of the server for a half hour... I decided I would offer to "drive him back to his body" being that it was an accident and all. I asked him to get on the main road near his spawn (Balota). As I drove down there sidechat was lighting up with "Hey.. who has the white car in elektro." Then it was "Hey... who has the white car in Cherno". Meanwhile the little shit was badmouthing everyone on the server... so naturally when I saw him on the road I gunned it and ran his ass over. The whole server started laughing in sidechat when his death message appeared. He then proceeded to call me all kinds of nasty names. So, I managed to track him down and dust him off in elektro while he was hiding in the bushes sniping with an Enfield.... I figured he'd had enough.Fast forward to the next day... and guess who is on running his lips again. So, I sequester the assistance of another member of the server and got him to tell that little pain in the ass that he's going to come pick him up in the car he found (naturally its my damn car and I'm driving). He accepts... so my new best friend tells him to get on the main road where he is...well you guys know where this is going. I hit him so hard his body flew into a barn.... started laughing and crashed my car on rubble. The server went crazy with "HOLY SHIT YOU GOT HIM WITH THAT AGAIN???? LAWLZ" About 2 minutes later I see the same kid running near elektro got out and shot him.I haven't seen him on the server since... but he has a l33t clan that is gunning for me. I'm scared...but I think I might be able to make it out of this alive.Too be Continued....LOL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KA4LxTITANx 8 Posted April 2, 2013 Too damn funny XD Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lord Sauron 18 Posted April 2, 2013 Second one was awesome. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Horny goldfish (DayZ) 10 Posted April 3, 2013 His so called "leet" clan is probably his cod kid friends thinking they are pro at army and survival sims Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jamespip 0 Posted April 3, 2013 Damn good job jBrick xD If I stumble across a kid such as this, I will be sure to introduce to the grill of my ride, hopefully I hit the same guy as you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jBrick 116 Posted April 5, 2013 ***UPDATE***My intrepid friend was on the server yet again running with a few of the server regulars. Naturally he is now suspicious of everyone that offers him a ride and is continually hiding on top of things where I can't get at him like he's in the movie Tremors. My new bestest best friend ever from another clan told him he had a car and needed help at a helicopter... my now suspicious target said he could come pick him up at Balota airfield.... and with that I was off with my red car of doom in that direction. Un friggen fortunately that stupid car doesn't offroad faster than a person runs. I literally chased him up and down Balota with it pegged for five friggen minutes while he was staying just out of reach. I finally got frustrated, hopped out of the car, shot his leg... and THEN ran him over.Annoying kid hit by car count: 3 7 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PitViperJoe 4 Posted April 15, 2013 That. Is. Awesome. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kebab Remover 110 Posted April 22, 2013 Remember kids, always watch out for washing machines when running idiots over.Also, the shot to the leg then run over is almost as good as the drag body off building one. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Trout (DayZ) 67 Posted April 24, 2013 Wicked awesome! Well done OP! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
raynor009 204 Posted April 24, 2013 haha good one a lol'd hard Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kunaskev Z. Ulteria 0 Posted April 25, 2013 While I hate bandits.... I hate snobby children even more. Take my beans. The more snobby children getting trolled the better. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites