Cannabeast

Fantastic tales. I'm not scared though, but I might just be brain-damaged.

Um, you are dumb.

So you and your friends suck so hard you can't get decent gear to fight back the people who got their weapons the legitimate way? Okay then.

Sniping is just a tool in the bandit's arsenal. To you however, that AS50 AWS seems to be the whole toolbox. Enjoy the hate because you don't impress me either. Thank god this game isn't an eSport. Then people would actually be impressed with your pathetic digits.

AS50s suck if you play at night. M107s are the same. DMR is the shit.

An M249 SAW. That's a serious answer. Edit: To expound, it doesn't do that much damage per hit, 3555/per, but one or two shots will knock someone out. It's audible range is low as heck, meaning you can use it in towns without getting mobbed (playing smart of course), clip size is best in the game, and if other players are within hearing distance of this gun, best believe they are hitting the dirt and considering their next option. The terrifying sound this gun makes and the full auto on it makes it instill fear in the hearts of CQB bandits (the worst kind).

Elektro: Stay a bit, see all the players pass by. Stay a bit more, see all the people running towards you. Stay a lot more, and somebody is going to ghost you.

I made it through an eighth of this MEGAPARAGRAPH OF DOOM and all I can say is well-moderated private hives will do the trick for your group. I havebeen playing for more than a week at this server and it is hacker-free. Password protected. Go to rinaun.com and visit the forums to get started. See you in-game! I can't promise you I'll be friendly though.

Stealing is fine. Wait until you get a tent so people can do it to you and the cycle completes itself! Also, stealing a fixed up car is so much better than fixing up one from scratch. I've actually killed someone who just hopped on their ATV for the first time after fixing it. I had it for days before I flipped it (ATVs kinda suck). He got to sit on it for no more than two seconds. You do the math.

Heard it too. Never seen it. Always check them like a fool though.

I don't think you haven't played enough because my group sees vehicles at their spawn areas a lot. This is not the best way, however. Fixing up cars, though mentally rewarding, is tedious and dangerous even at night. The best way like the others have mentioned here is to take advantage of other people's hard work and steal already fixed-up ones. Northern and western forests. Bring like 3 cans of pop 3 cans of food and you'll find a vehicle/camp inside of an hour.

Strictly for lulz. Or you know, you can actually do this drinking game with your survivor/bandit group. Take a shot/swig whenever: You light a campfire You have to run more than 200m Someone breaks a bone for funny/unrealistic reasons You get a murder/bandit kill You get murdered You find a chopper crash You see artifacts onscreen You get past one of the many DayZ loading screens Feel free to add...