Grimey Rick

I'm not saying I want to be bunny-hopping all around Chernarus 180º jump-spin-headshotting kids with my Magnum from 400 meters, trust me on that. I just want fluidity in my movements. I want to feel like I'm actually controlling my character. If I die, I want it to be because I fucked up, not because my character randomly ran three extra steps for some unknown reason. Also, when did I develop this identity of a troll? Lol. I post a lot of cynical, sarcastic bullshit, but it generally has a point. Someone has to fight the evil fucking machine! ;3

+1 for the best one-liner I've seen in a while that made me lol irl.

I'm sorry, where did I state I don't like DayZ? I love DayZ, obviously. And I still play CS and UT. That's the magical thing about video games: you're not bound to only one and can play them as your mood changes! DayZ has the potential to be my favorite game of all time, and it very well may live up to that potential. However, there's no denying that games like CS and UT that have been around for years, have a massive following spanning two generations now, and have been nurtured since 1999 are better games. We're comparing polished products to an alpha. Genres are genres. You can't say that a game is better than another based simply on its genre. However, you can say that a game is better based on controls, user interface, performance, gameplay, graphics, replayability, etc. This game is so very clunky and unenjoyable to move around in which is a severe hindrance to a game that has you running around for all of your time playing. I'm sure they'll eventually fix it, but it's mind-blowing that they released what they released the other day, especially after the critique on Experimental beforehand.

I hope not. I sure as fuck don't play games with assault rifles, the ability to force-feed others disinfectant, handcuffs and burlap sacks to make friends.

That's probably what happened, and sort of what I was referring to. Generally when my characters have been wiped it's because I join a black sheep of a server. Sometimes I can get them back, but most of the time I'm boned.

We should be so lucky. DayZ/Arma will never be as good a game as UT or CS. I lol'd. Incoming... I lol'd again. I didn't play Arma much. I didn't play Arma 2 much. I haven't played Arma 3 much. I didn't play the Mod much. I own them all, but I just don't like them. However, I have played the Standalone for 1,250 hours. In my opinion, the OP is right in suggesting we need better gunplay. I am all for authenticity/realism, but I didn't come to realize how important accurate, smooth controls are until this last update that set the game back months. I would rather have responsive controls that enable for a more fulfilling PVP experience than getting shot in the arm because my fucktard of a character can't seem to comprehend how to stop properly at a corner, or by having my head blown off because even after pressing "Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z, Z", he still won't fucking prone behind a small stone wall. At the end of the day, this is a game where injecting morphine/applying a splint mends a broken arm/leg in seconds. It's already plenty unrealistic. We might as well make it satisfying to run around and interact with the environment since we all spend 90% of our time so doing.

He said he was on the northern border of the map. There are no zombies even remotely close to the northern border. Unless they changed it within the last few days, zombies don't yet spawn in Novodmitrovsk. The odds of someone stalking him for the duration of the trip to the northern border not once, but twice is extremely unlikely.Your character is supposed to remain in-game for thirty seconds after you disconnect, however, I've seen people remain in-game for upwards of a minute after logging out.I wasn't aware any of us have been playing the Standalone for years; luckily for those of us who've only been playing it for months, it only takes a little common sense to figure out the best place within your vicinity to log out.Yeah, I'm 'a go ahead and guess that this alpha is broken and that character wipes still happen.

Farming Hoe/Shovel = Worms Worms + Fishing Hook = Bait Rope + Ashwood Stick = Fishing Rod Attach bait to fishing rod. Put rod in hands while standing in water. Wait. Keep checking hook with mouse wheel. Wait until you see a message in red telling you to reel in the fish. (I forget the exact message, only fished once when it was initially implemented.) EDIT: Fucking phone.

It's not fixed. They haven't even begun addressing third party software cheats, and using these cheats enables you to import any item you want. Two nights ago me and DeathTaX encountered a guy in Berezino with an infinite SKS, and that's not even mentioning the plethora of hacked M4s still being created.

A socially inept 15 year old, imagine that.

0.47 rolled out on Stable exactly as it was on Experimental: broken. They've done this type of thing before; they don't release an update for a while, then decide to push one to Stable when they know full well it's a buggy mess. The most prevalent example of this was the memory leak issue they had with flickering icons in your inventory. They pushed that to Stable on a Friday knowing full well that it was an issue plaguing Experimental, then they went home for the weekend with a promise on Twitter to "begin working on a fix Monday". The melee system was terrible on Experimental before it rolled out to Stable, too. They knew it'd cause an uproar. Then they "acknowledge" the problem and promise a fix ASAP. It's like they're pretending it was some unforeseen glitch. It's stupid. I'm beginning to believe they're afraid to wait a little longer between updates ever since they started going a month between them. I'd rather they take two months to fix something and keep it quarantined to, y'know, the servers that are labeled EXPERIMENTAL, rather than just drop it on Stable so that everyone has to endure their inability to meet their own deadlines. Meh, whatever. With a "disclaimer" shoved into your face at every juncture, I guess there's nothing you can really say. Early Access alphas are hilarious.

inb4 seething hatred of DayZ forums zombies Also, hello Mr. Popo.

When did they fix the burlap sack?

You gotta wonder what goes on in the developers' meetings before launching something like this, though. "Hey, the current melee system, while unpolished, still works very well. Players are able to fend off zombies with relative ease provided they're accurate with their swings." "Yeah, you're right. Let's implement a new melee system that, even when a player lands what would appear to be a successful hit on the zombie, rolls a random number from 1 to 10. If the number rolled is 2, 3, 5, 6, 7 or 9, have the player miss. In other words, let's break it." "Sounds good. Starbucks for break?" "Hell no. Why pay good money for Starbucks when we can drink gallons of tears on the official forums that we neglect in favor of Twitter and Reddit?" "Dude, you're a Deanius."

inb4 DayZ defense squad

Shh, don't aggravate the DayZ cheerleading team. They'll have your posts locked and sent to the Graveyard faster than they could suck a golf ball through a garden hose. ;3

580 vs 760 It doesn't, really. I just saw you mention that the 580 ran DayZ "just fine". Of course it ran DayZ just fine, it's still a great card. The 760 does AF a lot better and uses a lot less power than the 580, but that's about it. My kid uses one of my old 580s that I ran in SLI before upgrading to 780 Ti SLI, and it's still running games like BF4 and AC4 on medium-high settings at 60 FPS. Anyway, congratulations on your upgrade! I'm glad you're enjoying it.

If this has been perfection so far, I'd hate to see a disaster.

His memory is fine; it sounds more driver related to me. There are very few reasons to add more than 4GB of RAM to a computer. While 4GB is not ideal, it's certainly not causing his stuttering. My computer doesn't even use 4GB when I'm playing DayZ with Skype and twenty tabs open on Chrome. Try updating your drivers, or if they're up to date, reinstall them. You could also try verifying the DayZ file cache. Your computer is definitely capable of running DayZ. There's a culprit somewhere.

GTX 580 is roughly equivalent to a GTX 760.

I had to shoot a guy with it five times from one end of the hallway to the other in the TEC building. They were all chest shots. It's like a shitty Mosin. Slapping it on the list with the IZH-43, Sporter 22, and MP5-K of guns not to bother picking up.

So basically every house except for log houses, small green houses with stairs, and small red houses with stairs? ;3

They spawned in 0.46.

Jesus dude, do you play on a Game Boy? Much respect for gaming with those graphics.