Montague Fitzwilliam III

and what may I ask are you contributing towards this topic? Besides your hollow masquerade as a moderator. I think the OP speaks perfect sense, I too react badly to this word friendly, which so many players seem to weild as some kind of magic incantation which shall protect them from harm.

Perhaps they could spawn at medical camps and hospitals, or maybe we could craft them from everyday items such as 2 sturdy sticks, some canvas, a length of twine or fishing line for example. A stretcher to carry the wounded away to more peaceable surroundings where they might receive appropriate medical attention, or perhaps to remove an unconscious victim to a more secluded and suitably private locale for the draining of blood, or for mindless torture or whatever else the infinitely depraved minds of this god forsaken community care to conjure up.

If there is one thing I like less than working class ragamuffins running amok causing all manner of inconvenience and hullabaloo at precisely the time I am attempting to enjoy a peaceful relaxing luncheon, it's sloppy staff. Today I lost my valet, b4astard, who, no sooner than I'd barked instructions for him to go outside and put a stop to the damned shooting and squabbling which was taking place in the streets below my penthouse suite balcony, was on his merry way, loaded mosin at the ready and ammunition aplenty. As I polished off my packet of rice washed down with a litre of the finest purified water drawn fresh from the pond that morning I listened as b4stard dealt with the nuisances below, I counted 23 shots before the racket subsided. Several minutes elapsed before the bloody dishevelled form of b4stard appeared at the doorway. 'Begging you pardon my lord' he grunted 'any chance you could sort me out a bandage and give me some blood?I took a couple of rounds before I done em' 'For pity's sake man don't trail your rancid proletarian blood across the rug, go and wait on the stairs I shall be with you just as soon as I have finished my tuna' I replied, rather impatiently perhaps. but one does expect better from those whom have been gifted the honour of serving one. 26 minutes had passed when I found his lifeless corpse atop the stairs, I calmly stepped over it being extremely careful not to soil my new nikes and descended to the ground floor where I exited the building into the sun soaked day and embarked upon my morning stroll. Suffice it to say the position has again become available, contact should be made as described in my original post. Good day.

The first died at Rourkes drift don't you know, he was rushed by some Zulus while engaged in the act of shaving in the preparation for battle. Damned unsporting of them if you ask me. The 2nd died of natural causes at the ripe old age of 87, although he almost bought it during a duel with the 14th Earl of Wessex, a small disagreement over the ownership of the town of Tonbridge Wells, he caught some ball shot in the arm but maintained composure and calmly despatched the earl with a rather well placed head shot.

As that noble member of the Hastings hunt, The 4th Duke of Marlborough, once famously said, 'Not if one sees you first old boy.'

I think not.

Of course we are amidst troubled times, society has fallen and the crumbling remnants of modern civilization lay around us in smouldering heaps. However, there seems to me to be no good reason to allow standards to continue to slip even further into the mire. Post apocalypse or not there is simple no excuse for poor manners and if we are to try our damndest to turn this God forsaken situation around we need to cling onto the few vestiges of human decency remaining to maintain the clear separation between man and beast. So, if I may be so bold I make the following suggestion. Why not add the option to doff ones cap upon the approach of a fellow survivor? Good manners cost nothing and if we are to have any hope of restoring order to the current chaos and murder and filth it is the small gestures, the glue that once held society firmly in place that shall aid us in that noble quest.

The successful applicant shall be expected to be able to follow simple instructions to the letter and be able to obey without question all commands. He (or, in the interests of the current fashion for sexual equality, she) shall be of sound body and mind, shall adhere to the simple adage 'respect your betters' and when called upon might be required to take the occasional bullet. You should be familiar with all medical procedures, have a sound knowledge of the Chernarus landscape and indeed be able to locate quickly any and all required provisions and resources relating to my survival. health and overall wellbeing. Although I am a strict task master who expects service of the highest standards and shall have no hesitation in resorting to the strongest of disciplinary measures should the occasion call for them, I am fair. The successful applicant shall be provided with a generous allowance allowing him/her to be amply clothed, watered and fed and a small annex shall be provided for his/her shelter close to the main house. On no account am I to be disturbed on Tuesday Evenings. All communications regarding this matter should be forwarded to my personal postal address and my response shall be forthcoming pending my perusal of said applications. Good day.