Hetstaine 10852 Posted October 11, 2012 For the tldr crew..skip directly to the last two pics ;)So i'm chilling near Elektro , waltz into a barn and spot a cz550, Fuck me..i have not seen a cz in a barn for donkeys ! Now my mate and i have just hooked the pc up to a 60 inch screen and are basking in the wonderment of it all, scoping around and checking shit out ..looks madly brilliant. Settings pumped. I hand over my char to him , long story short..he spilt a glass of rum on his pc , through the top casing fan and onto his power supply and gtx680..nice work, no pc for him for a few weeks. So anyway he is getting withdrawals and me being a generous sort of dude i give him a run. Straight away he snipes guys in Elektro..he misses a bunch of dudes and then goes down for an Elektro loot run, picks up a double barrell and a mak at the school , grabs some food at the shops then dives into the fire station. Two axe dudes come waltzing past, one in a hero suit and one in standard spawn gear. BOOM! BOOM! i am like dude wtf , why you shooting fool ?? He just instantly pops away..and misses. From under 20 feet. Dude in the hero suit is like..'woah back big fella..slow up there cowboy!' The other axe dude gives chase. cue benny hill music.. I am like stop shooting you fool ! So he legs it headed to the train station, two axe guys in tow, all sprinting down the street. I figure we have enough of a lead that we can type quickly to them and make amends. Not a chance, the closest axe man gets a swing at us so we leg it agin bleeding. Old mate Hero suit ends up being Sausages and Mash, who then takes out the dude axing my char. Lolz were had. To make sure he is dead my mate puts two more shottie shells into his face at .5 feet range. So i ask Sausage if he can show my mate the ropes and take him for a run. He legs it up above Elektro to a stashed hippie van and we cruise off. We have not been taking note of where are going (my mate and i anyway) as i am explaining to him my keyboard layout, i am an arrow guy not a wasd dude. So we end up near some trees , in a forest, under the sky, Thats the best i can pinpoint it. I ask old Sausage if he can blood me, we blood up. Sausage then tells us he needs to be alone in the bush to die, he is too smashed to go any further and must be left to the woods..to spur him on we put a mak bullet in the side window of the hippie van and he gets a some life in him ' woah woah dudes ! dont shoot the fucking wheels man! ' So he calls it..'Lets head to the nw field ..take me there ..i'm to drunk to drive.' I jump in, i have now kicked my mate off my char and taken over, i notice Sausage's parking skillz.. To be fair, i have killed more cars than a hacker can spawn in standard 5 minute session. Just as i start to head out this dude appears in front of us and starts poppin' rounds at the front windscreen. i am like wtf man ! I head straight for him at about 1.8 kilometres an hour, if he goes to sleep now he is definitely dead ! But alas he avoids my rampaging madness by walking slowly to the side as we throttle past. He gets off a few more shots as i am navigating the trees and slowly picking up some downhill speed, now i told you earlier of my l33t driving ability, this is where i prove that racing blood runs in my veins and my track skillz come to the fore.. I hit the tree full on. At about 7 k's an hour. Possibly slower. My passenger awakes, no doubt surrounded by fire , and saying ' wtf dude ? Whats happenin' man..you trashed the car ! ' I can only assume he passed out as soon as he jumped in and missed the whole shootout deal , waking up only when his face started melting into the dashboard. I have already bailed and watched the shooter appear on my far left skirting through the bushes and heading for us. I keep my distance and run beside him seperated by about 100-150 odd metres. We exchange shots, both of us on the move and flitting from tree to tree. I end up getting behind one tree and observe him, knowing he has lost me as he is looking the wrong way , i start to flank and then get in close enough to nail him, but i only have my Mak ..using all my shottie ammo earlier.. trying to scare him away with the boomstick sound. I spy him looking around from his tree, if i had anything else but the mak he would be a goner... Close up of above.. I waste a couple of mags of Mak at him and forced him to flee , chasing him for about another minute then lost him in a bunch of firs so gave up and legged it back to check out my car parking action. Boss parking.. Thinking old mate might still be hanging around i legged it off for Stary, hearing a chopper in the distance ..but that is a tale for another day.. 5 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted October 11, 2012 I blacked out during the car incident all i remember was thinking i'm getting a dui so pulled over next thing was random dude saying break yo self and pumping the ride full of lead Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Welch (DayZ) 756 Posted October 11, 2012 I didn't understand half of this story. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted October 11, 2012 I have the drunk guy (me) version a few threads down minus the cool pictures Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Derpy_Hooves (DayZ) 4521 Posted October 11, 2012 i need to come out on an adventure with you guys!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RogueOne 112 Posted October 11, 2012 I'll drive for you guys anytime :) Sounds like good times! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hetstaine 10852 Posted October 11, 2012 I didn't understand half of this story. Do you play dayz ? Sausage..i have not seen your version yet, scampering off now :) Should i take ice and a glass ? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jason_m_perry@hotmail.com 38 Posted October 11, 2012 Hetstaine. I love your adventures. Lets hook up sometime bud! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hetstaine 10852 Posted October 11, 2012 Requirements are alchohol and at least one item of womans clothing. If i or Steak and mash even suspect you have man undies on you will more than likely be axed brutally :) Bonus item is a musty and some attitutde :thumbsup: ..did i mention beer ? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Derpy_Hooves (DayZ) 4521 Posted October 11, 2012 Requirements are alchohol and at least one item of womans clothing. If i or Steak and mash even suspect you have man undies on you will more than likely be axed brutally :) Bonus item is a musty and some attitutde :thumbsup: ..did i mention beer ?I have a Musty, plenty attitude and im a Scotsman... beer is a plenty!! do i qualify? 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Highspiral 82 Posted October 11, 2012 Excellent err... "Photography" ? you've got that storytelling skill.My favs are definitely the "van in a tree" or is it a "tree in a van" ?And the Bored zombie as disinterested forum reader at the end. :beans: :beans: :beans: :beans: 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RogueOne 112 Posted October 11, 2012 Requirements are alchohol and at least one item of womans clothing. If i or Steak and mash even suspect you have man undies on you will more than likely be axed brutally :) Bonus item is a musty and some attitutde :thumbsup: ..did i mention beer ?I just finished a handful of corona's and always wear thongs when playing dayz. We have the makings of a Dream Team here! 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted October 11, 2012 The Scot can where a kilt but no undies if anyone needs to borrow womens clothing I have an abundace on friday-sunday. And the growth of our drunken brigade will bring in the tranny juices. More for the slenderman hunts. Het nice aerial of my parking the tree was like additional brake pads its known the slender man smelt your blood as I bagged you and triggered a natural reaction to kill us. The drunken brigade is on AU46 tonight hope to see a car full of tranny mashing, slender hunting drunkards trying to keep the wheels on the bus going round and round. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Derpy_Hooves (DayZ) 4521 Posted October 11, 2012 i can do commando in ma kilt, dinnie have tae worry boot that ;) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RogueOne 112 Posted October 11, 2012 I'll be there, Just need to pound a few more Corona's first. ;P Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hetstaine 10852 Posted October 11, 2012 Look what you have done now Mash..Chernarus and its inhabitants will be fucked :D 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted October 11, 2012 got a fresh bottle of whiskey waiting for me Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted October 11, 2012 Look what you have done now Mash..Chernarus and its inhabitants will be fucked :DAt this rate I'm gonna put money on me dying first while trying to reach a hatchet zed score of 200 in less than 1 hour Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Derpy_Hooves (DayZ) 4521 Posted October 11, 2012 At this rate I'm gonna put money on me dying first while trying to reach a hatchet zed score of 200 in less than 1 hourDon't worry buddy i'll help ya out with ma Claymore! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hetstaine 10852 Posted October 11, 2012 Maybe if you just run up to Stary and we can have a quick axe off and kill each other first ? Just so we get the deaths out of the way before we get into some serious zed hooker action ? I fancy we could even open up a zed knock shop on the run in from Kamenka to Belota bylota that fucking airfield..something to ease the pain of those guys who prefer the suicide bridge tactic. You bring the tie down straps and i will scab up some dog mouth guards..unless you want to go hardcore mode and just open the door and throw new spawns in ? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted October 11, 2012 We can run the service out of the van fixer up park it in komorovo zed tranny hookers for beans and chemlights. Video tape it while we drain a bottle and post the ZED bang bus Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
