Cap'n (DayZ) 1827 Posted August 6, 2013 (edited) It was morning. The sun peaks above the horizon, it's warm auburn rays warm my face. I look to sidechat, and glance away to scratch my crotch. A player, only known by his alias "Eli" offers a ride on his motorbike. I feel inclined to ask, but nasty logic gets in the way. After a desync, restart, and finding an AK, I finally ask if I can join him on his magical ride. I await him at the factory, running in circles to avoid getting hit by my ardent pursuers. I hear the low grumble of his bike as it approaches, and I eagerly swagger out to meet him. We exchange a gleeful but cautious hello, and I hop on. The engine starts, and we take off. It's painfully slow, barely faster than running. We decide to head to Berezino, and I park the bike at the barn complex. We loot the town, finding mediocre loot and medical supplies. He switches between VOIP and typing frequently, as so do I. I'm nervous to speak in my jumbled attempt to add depth to my horny teen persona. As Eli loots the tents, I over watch from the apartments I hear the exchange of gunfire. Eli kills his assailant, who refused to accept our calls of friendship. My attention wonders, as I spot a bandit headed strait to Eli. I raise my CZ, and place him on the tip of the chevron. I shoot him once, and he bleeds, shoot him a second time and he still lives. He falls to slumber, and I finish him off with the remainder of my rounds. I work my way through the zombies, and we search for car parts to fix our shitty motorbike. We find nothing of value, and return to the city. We find refuge in the hospital, exchanging blood and bandages. But something happens. A viral zed, enraged with aggro, glitches through the barrier and hits me. I'm infected. I scream over voice "DAMMIT!", and throw my keyboard across the room. I kill myself, and Eli swears to protect my body. As I run back, I look to side to witness the death message. Eli has died. Rage fills my heart, and I set off to find whoever killed my new friend. After running back and forth for car parts, I have two wheels and an engine and I stumble upon the barn complex. It's gone. I switch to side, and ask in a clear, emotionless tone. Who took my bike? No answer. I ask again. No answer. I ask a third time, and no one claims responsibility. Anger fills my soul, but something attracts my attention. A bus and a motorbike going further into Berezino. Its my bike. I scream over side, threatening the crooks. I run out, Enfield blazing. I yell out, "EAT ME BUS BOY!". I scream it, again and again, but no response. I destroy one of their tires, and they come to a stop. A zed runs up, and one hit infects me. I curse, and lose my will to live. I run up to them, and scream into voice "EAT ME BITCHES, EAT ME!". They open fire, and I witness my flesh shatter and my bones break, and I pass out. One of them comes to me, and pulls out his sidearm. "Nice bike, bitch.". "Cap'n has died". I quit after that. Edited August 6, 2013 by Cap'n 7 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steak and Potatoes 13480 Posted August 6, 2013 Eat me bus boy, all I needed to read. :beans: 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Skat3rat 1633 Posted August 6, 2013 lyk dis if u cri evrytim. Some paragraphs would of been nice but it was a good read. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cap'n (DayZ) 1827 Posted August 6, 2013 lyk dis if u cri evrytim. Some paragraphs would of been nice but it was a good read.Fuck paragraphs. I want you to be breathless when you finish. That way, I can reply BEFORE you start being critical of me. I'm talking to you, Orlok. 3 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cap'n (DayZ) 1827 Posted August 6, 2013 Great read :)Thanks Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hetstaine 10852 Posted August 6, 2013 I didn't think i said Nice bike Bitch..i thought it was more ..Nice bikepants..Bitch. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cap'n (DayZ) 1827 Posted August 6, 2013 I didn't think i said Nice bike Bitch..i thought it was more ..Nice bikepants..Bitch.You like my oily legs? I did just for you, hessy. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ducklick 2 Posted August 6, 2013 Ah yes, your stolen bike. Wherever it may be now. Thanks for killing me in Berez btw :P. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cap'n (DayZ) 1827 Posted August 6, 2013 Ah yes, your stolen bike. Wherever it may be now. Thanks for killing me in Berez btw :P.That you Marietta? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites