TheGuiterhero 1 Posted November 22, 2012 (edited) :( Edited November 28, 2012 by TheGuiterhero 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rewand 0 Posted November 22, 2012 Haha newb why did you killed yourslef you are gonna get a shitty spawn now. These guys had beans and mountain dew's and you killed him then commited suicided, you left Mathias in a deep shit and he probably died beacause 2 shots were fired and now it's a 1v3. Noob. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rossums 2190 Posted November 22, 2012 I...I...what? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChAoS_Nope 0 Posted November 23, 2012 what did I just read Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TZUGARIS 26 Posted November 23, 2012 Well that was... I don't even....I think you should take a few classes bud because that story was more bland then tofu. 1 Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheGuiterhero 1 Posted November 23, 2012 Why does nobody like my story? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TZUGARIS 26 Posted November 23, 2012 Why does nobody like my story?I don't hate it at all its just that there is really no detail in the story... What happened to that sniper? What happened after the narrator got bit? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CyanidC 39 Posted November 23, 2012 Why does nobody like my story?because it's plain bad. As Tzugaris said, tofu has more spice in it than your story. It's so boring i had to force myself through every line and it took me about 3 tries to finish this carboard equivalent of a story. -The characters are everything but 3-dimensional, they're not even 2-dimensional. they're a dot in the boring sky you painted with that piece. None of them matter, none of them have anything interesting about them.-Your phrasing is as dull as it could be, honestly, you're either 10-14 years old and this is your first attempt on writing a story, or English isn't your first language. If this is your first story, you have lot's of improving to do and you have the solid ground to do so. If this isn't your first story or your second or your third, you should consider either changing the audience or stop writing at all.-The Pace was awfull, it was like being forced to walk on a treadmill that is on a too fast setting for just walking. My advice to you:-improve your english(if it's not your first language)-find more interesting words, go read some books or just look up words in a Thesaurus-Read more books-Read more books-write shorter stories, but thicken the plot Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Derpy_Hooves (DayZ) 4521 Posted November 23, 2012 Why does nobody like my story?It's not the case that no one "likes" it, it's just there is room for improvement.You should maybe take what they say as "Constructive Criticism" and then work on it... yes not all reviews will be what you want to see but then you can improve your work using the advice people give.Keep up your work, and don't take everything to heart.... it is the internet after all! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheVoltageWolf 0 Posted November 25, 2012 .....um okay? Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
#Sleepy 572 Posted November 27, 2012 I didn't read it, but I have this issue when I can't watch TV shows or movies when someones like "embarrassing" themselves. And I don't think that's the correct word for it, but when you asked "Why does nobody like my story?" I just felt so bad. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
