Imafighter

/drives HMMVW in water /loses wheels and explodes

I was playing on a vanilla server yesterday, and had joined during the late hours. Night was falling. I had spawned in Cherno, and decided to loot it. After picking up an Enfield, Makarov, and some food and drink, something drew me to a small red brick house. Inside, I found a Mountain Dew. Praising my luck, I asked for a ride from a bus earlier so we could undertake the dark quest of...drinking the Dew on Green Mountain. We drove there, getting lost along the way while being chased by Batman on a Motorcycle, and got out. The person driving the bus accompanied me into the base. A Bum was his name. While debating where to drink it, he suggested on top of the mass of dead bodies. I went on the bodies, and opened the legendary can of Dew. I drink it down, and look around for my friend. He was nowhere to be seen, and I look to the chat in time to see "A Bum: Signature Check time out." I sighed with sadness, and heard a report from my friend Domination that he had just seen a helicopter spinning out of control and crash into the ground. Hoping I could see from the tower, I climbed it, and as I got up, I hear another person climbing the ladder, but find no one. I started throwing flares, in desperation to keep whatever the great Dew spirit had sent to haunt me. I cried aloud for help, but to no avail. With as much speed as possible, I climbed down the ladder and sprinted to the bus, and drove away from that place. Now until I find my next Mountain Dew, I am safe. But when I do find it...may the spirit have mercy on me.

Crap! Its Batman! Run, Forrest, run! And he has his bike!

Now...we must drink it at exactly 3:33 AM! But where would be the "correct" spot to drink it...?

Building blocked?! NONSENSE! You just simply need to find a hatchet. Then chop, chop, choppity chop. Or find a bicycle or car.

Placing tents in a church?! What is this blasphemy!? You dare interrupt the prayer to the one and only holy one? Destroy him!

/touch sign with uaz /uaz go boom and get launched 100 meters

NEAF?

Today, I was in Cherno, and was watching my friend kill zombies. I heard no shots from his gun, though. It was a G17, so it wasn't silenced. Does anybody know how to fix this problem? I can also hear shots in normal OA and ArmA II. Seems to be a problem with just DayZ.

You're an interesting post. >:o

Also, @OP, whachu doin' on the coast with a British Assault Pack and Camo Clothes? And its looks like an automatic weapon?

Best troll move ever.

You got killed by an M24 or M40A3.

AS50s are a one shot kill. Anywhere.

A sniper wasted 8 shots on me while I was running from zeds and unarmed. Talk about bad aim, plus a freshspawn killer.

What brought me? The survival aspect. What did I find? A ton of banditos. What did I do? Hide in the forests with my M24, picking off bandits that happen to by unlucky enough to come into my sights.

Rage, you needed to record that. :P

Can I have the link to his profile?

Who exactly are they, and what makes them special? Can anybody give me specific details about the server? Like, spawning items, day cycle, custom loot, etc?

"You will always be logged into Teamspeak while playing the game servers." Whats so important about Teamspeak? :c

:(

Do the vanilla ones have a good amount of players, and a full day/night cycle? Does that mean there are extra vehicles? >.>

Pigs have breasts? Since when? :o

Same as a Hatchet. Looks cooler. The apocalypse is all about style, though, amirite?

CoD kiddie: The guys the around around the coast with automatic weapons/sniper rifles, doing nothing but shooting freshspawns that have nothing but a Hatchet or a Makarov.