N0FG

lol Some of you folk on here are insane. You're hoping I don't have any kids because of a sarcastic statement made on a video game forum. Yeah, they probably will grow up...normal. However, if they don't and he wakes up...(and this is done by opening his eyes).... one day with a hatchet buried in his head....(and this doesn't always kill the victim).......at least, he wont have to ask the reason why, to his son he so delightfully describes to a bunch of strangers on the internet as, a turd.....(which is a piece of shit)....nice!. Oh and thanks for your concern about my parenting skills, but I believe in the same kind my own parents taught me, respect others and their property. Never did they have to apply draconian style groundings (or beatings) and then go online to boast about it later, to teach me this. Whatever works for you though, right?. :rolleyes:

Well, if the OP ever wakes one day with a hatchet buried in his head, at least he wont need to ask the little turd why he did it. :huh:

The Wookie suit, at last...IT'S MINE!. Without a second thought I put it on and scatter the survivor rags I've been wearing for dayz across the apartment floor. Seconds later I'm out of there and running free, free from fear, free from anger, just brim full of excitement and eager to roll around in the forest ...unseen. I head north, perhaps now I'll make it to the elusive airfield I've been striving to get to since this nightmare started. At first, the lack of a map and compass meant nothing to 'Ghillieman' as I thought surely the powers of fake leaves and camo print underwear would see me through any difficulties I may encounter, that and the fact I only had to go straight north to reach my destination. After what seemed like hourz, I was close, I'd came across some rock formations I'd seen on a map in a past life and knew some good loot was now within my grasp. Running through the forest like a Sasquatch having a fit, I hear something, it sounds like the ocean, it reminds me of putting a shell to my ear when I was a child and hearing distant waves crashing off a beach. I decide it's just fatigue playing with me and venture on, after all, there aren't any beaches near the airfields in the north. However, as I push my way through the trees the sound gets louder, suddenly I clear the dark comforting embrace of the tightly packed spruce only to find myself indeed, on the beach. What the..ffft, how can this be, has somebody nerfed the airfield, changed the map since I last saw one. As I look across the sandy shoreline I can see the imposing silhouette of factory towers peering through the mist. This is not the airfield?....it kinda looks like....omfg, it is!. It's the bottom end of Berezino, the town where I'd originally found my beautiful new clothes in the first place. Engulfed in Ghillimania and running around like a half crazed lunatic, it seems I'd been too busy to even notice I'd been traveling in a fully crazed circle...Doh!. After a short period of 'effin'n'blindin' and generally cursing my noobness for not finding a map and compass at the shop across the street before taking off for Ghillland, I looked down the coast in the opposite direction only to be confronted with a shipwreck!. Once again, I was running. As I got nearer the vessel I could make out it was the remains of some kind of tanker ship, though the working life of this big girl was long over because she sat slumped against the rocks like a giant rusted tin of baked beans ripped open at one end. At least that's what Ghillieman saw as it had been some time since he'd last eaten and everything was beginning to look like beans to him. Upon closer inspection and to my utter surprise there was a little motor launch floating just offshore beside the ship and without hesitation, I jumped straight into the water and swam over. Yet again surprised, it was actually 'enterable' and further more had petrol in it, 'holy shmokes' I thought to myself, someones bound to shoot me in the head right now. Not surprisingly, but shockingly, nobody did and I started up the engines and putt, putt, putted off towards the ship. Now I've been in faster and more agile bath tubs in my time, but to me this little beauty was a jet boat... and all mine, "Captain Ghillieman" on the high seas. When I got to the back of the ship I could see by the the way it was sitting that I could probably get aboard. Unfortunately it was at this point an overwhelming sense of greed took over, surely there has to be some mega loot hidden within the confines of this dilapidated sea hulk. So after parking 'Talula' close by, I jumped off and swam over to get aboard the good ship 'Looticus'. CRUNCH!!. I'd never encountered this sound before, but having experienced it many times since I soon learned it was the sound of my Tibia snapping into pieces....NOOOOOOOOO!!. The screen went grey, fuzzy and began pulsing with arterial regularity, I felt like it was the Sunday morning after a busy Saturday night, what the hell is going on and who's got a Nurofen!?. Slowly, half blindingly I made my way to the nearby beach avoiding the rocks just in case I too succumbed to the same fate that obviously bestowed itself upon 'Looticus' many years ago. Dragging my wet and broken body out of the sea and up the sandy slope, I quickly used some a bandage, some painkillers and knocked back a tin of beans to help alleviate my collection of symptoms. This appeared to have little to no effect on my condition and my blood level was super low, what to do. After a few minutes speaking to my good buddy google, I was informed of the need for a morphine injection and the locations of said injectors, the hospitals. I was new to the game and didn't even know it had hospitals, so I wasn't very happy to find out the nearest one happened to be around 5 km away in Berezino, very close to Ghilliemans origins. Unable to hide the wookie suit as I'd ditched those now valuable survivor rags, a plan had to made. I didn't know anybody in game to help or about the medics so this left me with 2 choices, suicide or self rescue and considering I also didn't know the name of the server I was on due to my noobness, suicide and ghillie reclaim was out of the question which left me the latter of the 2, Here's how it went..... Crawl back to Talula, climb aboard and make my way to Berezino. Ran out of petrol just before the first factory, abandon ship and start to crawl. Avoid all zombies while passing out every few minutes. Computer crash. Reboot. Halfway and the artifact glitch kicks in.I can't see a fookin thing in the direction I'm heading. Avoid zombies I can't even see while continue passing out every few minutes. Hide under a bush for 10 minutes after I hear shots. Computer crash. Reboot. Crawl through town terrified I'm being stalked by the person who fired the shots, even though I'm on a new server..doh!. Artifacts getting worse the closer to the hospital I get, of course main cause of artifacts are...outside hospital. Panicking because I'm close, don't want to aggro zombies now, passed out at least 30 times so far. Computer crash. Reboot. Need food, risk it all with a stop at the shop for beans, nobody there but find a compass and map with a tin of beans, result!!. Around 3 hourz have passed but I've finally made it to the hospital, how do I get in, google tells me about the tin can. Crawl back to the shop for tin can, hide for 10 mins when I hear distant shots then pass out. Crawl back to the hospital, tin can wont throw, back to google. Assign new key for throw, tin can still wont throw, back to google. In fit of rage shoot at windows with hand gun and log out when I hear zombies coming. Log back in only to find he hospital windows are already broken, paranoia, somebody else did it, I'm about to get Ghillie raped. Nobody here, crawl inside apply morphine injection, broken leg fixed....woohoo!. Log out, the sun has already came up outside IRL and I'm fookin knackered, time for bed!. A few dayz later I log back in to find the hospital windows are fixed and I'm stuck inside. The screen is still grey, still fuzzy and still pulsing. Apparently I needed some cooked meat, a blood transfusion or about 40 cans of beans to fix it. Due to frustration rather than rage, this time I shoot the windows out with my trusty Enfield and through a horde of flesh eaters that instantly appear, I make a break for it. Blind and chased by over a dozen zombies, once again I'm running, full of fear, full of anger and no plans to roll around in the forest, but still heading north. It must have been a ridiculous sight to see from a distance and I'm getting a terrible feeling of Deja vu?. But this time I've got a compass and a map, what could go wrong?. About 40 minutes later I find out, in the midst of my frustration and very loud escape from the hospital I'd over looked another vital part of gear, any of the 40 tins of beans I needed. I was in the middle of nowhere with a food icon pulsing faster than my distorted vision, I needed beans and I needed them now. So the next building I saw, I had to loot and after 10 minutes of snake like maneuvers to get close whilst avoiding the 6 zombies outside I was distraught to find it was 'unenterable'. 10 minutes again later and I was clear of the faked chance of rescue, however when I stood up a zombie aggro'd on me and started running from a distance too far away to be fair, as I turned and started to run....I passed out. This time it was final and Ghillieman became lunch. I hope nobody found my corpse as that suit was definitely jinxed, but I was taught a few valuable lessons during this dayzcapade. 1. Learn how to use your back pack, 2. Learn how to throw a damn tin can 3. Always remember the beans and 4.Never leave town without a map and compass, no matter what you're wearing!!. Game addiction immediately set in.

When I dropped into this forum about a month ago, the first things I saw were a couple of very un moderator like posts. The first guy was making a half arsed apology which actually came off sounding more like a like a half arsed excuse for replying to a forum member in an inappropriate manner, while the second was stroking his ego and boasting something about his 'Ban Hammer'. At the time I thought it was certainly not the best example to be setting from the guys who are supposed to be looking after the place, but I like the game so I stuck around. Then recently something else happened that made me think the same way, but I'll get to that in a mo. In regards to this thread though, yeah there are a lot of threads about hackers and yes people do get pissed off with them. But it's the number one problem the mod is having and the number one reason why it's losing so many players. So I don't understand why anybody is surprised or that pissed off to see the threads. Considering there's apparently 1.2 million players of the mod, I fail to see how even a hundred threads about hackers can be seen as too many. Despite the fact that this forum is so busy, if a thread doesn't get replied to, it only takes a day before it's already 3 pages back on the list. Now correct me if I'm wrong, but don't moderators have the power to delete, lock and move threads. If so, then why hasn't one of you guys created a hacker 'sticky' thread and moved all of the subsequent hacker complaints there, instead of getting personally and in some cases, for want of a better word, unprofessionally involved in the topic. Surely this is an easy way to keep both the forum and yourselves 'cleaner' than what the current method of dealing with it achieves. If not, then I fear this forum will eventually need some more moderators to moderate the moderators!..which isn't a good thing as "everything is good in moderation' especially you guys. Point in hand, after this post I'll have a count of 8, though I can only find 7, now I can remember making another one, but it seems to have mysteriously vanished. It was in the "Collector's Edition Day Z (thoughts)" thread. When I saw that topic I thought, ffs it's like asking what your having for pudding before you even know what you're getting for dinner, so I made this reply as a double edged joke "A working copy of the game free from bugs, glitches and hackers." Then rather than replying to my post Fraggle, in his wisdom, decided to edit it with this " Most obvious response awarded to ....... YOU! ". Now, for a start, the most obvious response is definitely gonna be a real AS50, though in his 'opinion' I got the award. Regardless, I felt that it was an abuse of his mod powers to edit his little nugget of supposedly witty sarcastic gold into my post, instead of simply making a normal reply. So my answer was something along the lines of "Sweet, if there's a prize for this award I hope it's a working copy of the game free from bugs, glitches and hackers, but I'll gladly accept a real AS50 as there's probably more chance of that." A couple of dayz later when I was reading the thread I noticed that Puff!, the post had gone. No rhyme no reason, just gone .So what happened, gremlins, leprechauns, does the forum have bugs, glitches and hackers too, or are some of you guys falling short of what being a good moderator is all about and over stepping your remit a touch. Perhaps some of you might need to rethink your position, because while this forum is a place to talk about all thing DayZ, that also includes it's downsides and if you don't "like" it, then maybe your in the wrong unpaid 'Job'. Who's got the ban hammer?. :rolleyes:

I, like more than a few hundred thousand others bought Arma 2 for Dayz, without the mod I would've had no interest in buying Arma, but mainly because it slipped under my radar and I'm not that big on simulators, as such. However, now because of Dayz I'll be looking to buy both the standalone and Arma 3 when they get released. So that makes 3 new purchases for BI due to one mod and I'm just wondering if you Arma elitists will continue complaining as much when all the extra revenue that Dayz has created gets pumped back into new BI games. I'm damn sure nobody at the company itself has a bad word to say about it, considering it's estimated at being around 20% of Arma 2s total sales in just a few months. Plus some of you guys seem to forget that a player wakes up on the beach as a survivor, a normal Joe, so to be able to lift an AS50 and rain hell down on Cherno from a mile out seems to be pretty 'unbelievably' fookin good, let alone be expected to get into a helicopter and fly it!. Surely playing Arma 2 to learn how to play Dayz actually takes away from the surviving simulation experience the mod is trying to achieve and in that respect, wouldn't that mean it's a bad idea for new Dayz players to try it. Actually, it could then be argued that all you guys from Arma that are bitching are technically cheating in Dayz because you're all ex military, but yet you still wake up unarmed on the beach like the rest of us untrained civis....so what sort of an eejit does that make you?. Anyway, at the end of the day it's only a game, how about winding your necks in and stop taking it so fookin seriously, because if nothing else, it's your attitudes on here that is the main thing putting me off playing Arma.

A working copy of the game free from bugs, glitches and hackers. Most obvious response awarded to ....... YOU!

Life after an infected apocalypse will be terrifying, boring and more often than not, terrifyingly boring!. Objects and people don't re spawn IRL, to survive, people will have to keep searching new places for other people and or with, supplies, murder will take place, but mainly due to necessity rather than enjoyment. However, because players in the 'game' can simply re spawn at the beach when they die and re arm everywhere (often at hoarding tents), it kinda takes the edge off actually just surviving as the life clock seems to be the only perma loss. So when a player's main enemies are bugs and glitches it pushes people towards the PvP element and because perma death really means temporary loot death, the combat players don't mind going toe to toe for a tin of beans, their own gratification, griefing, trolling, nothing or for some..fun. This in turn has an unrealistic knock on effect for 'survivors' as they get to a point where they feel the need to KOS just to preemptively protect themselves. The brunt of consequences for most actions in the game fall mainly on the victim, with murder being rewarded with loot and a trendy 'Bandit' image. When most teens are too busy enjoying their actions to give a toss about consequences, good luck trying to change that way of thought for a video game, can't say as I blame them. Although they are missing out a lot on the psychological aspects of this game that most of the 'Fogeys' seem to play it for. Mind you, suffice to say, should an infected apocalypse actually happen, you can bet your beans most survivors will be moving around like bunny rabbits in bedroom slippers as sniping the unarmed with AS50s will simply turn you into lunch, A la 28 days/weeks later.

On the body of a dead hacker, I just found my first pair tonight. With them came a M9SD with ammo, M4A3 CCO with ammo, AS50 with ammo, GPS, Range finder, Military flashlight, toolbox, Ghille suit, map, entrenching tool, soldiers clothing, Coyote backpack and a box of matches. I'd just looted Cherno for med supplies, an Enfield, M1911 and loads of ammo. I then headed west trying to find a bus I'd seen out there before. When I came across a Ghillied corpse. I was suspect at first because he had a couple of Nvgs and range finders, but I thought he might be a hoarder so I geared up and made off for the treeline as fast as I could (waiting to be sniped on the way). Later, sitting on the hills looking down into Baloto with the AS50 a couple of thoughts bugged me. First of all I didn't want this weapon, I had the opportunity to pick it up at the NW once before, but left it mainly because I didn't want to be one of these faceless tossers who snipe random punters from a light year away. I haven't actually murdered anybody in Dayz yet, though the urge to KOS for self protection is getting harder to resist, but when and if I do, I want it to be for the right reasons, not just because I can. Secondly, if I am using hacked gear then I might as well just be a hacker. Whether ya hack the gear or are in possession of the hacked gear it's still cheating and wtf is the point of that. Even if ya don't kill other players with it you're still cheating yourself. In which case there's far better things to be doing with your time. Anyway, so I headed north into the wilderness, found a quiet spot and logged out. Obviously the soldiers clothing was the proof I was looking for, so after finding out it's not allowed (even though the rest of the gear technically is) I logged back into a random server and dumped it all under a tree.All except the pack and matches that is, I'll at least need them to carry my meds and cook me some steaks, while I get back to some weapon and food spawns, then I'll dump them too. Yet another nights headfuk courtesy of DayZ, lol thanks! :rolleyes: :D

Sorry, if this is too many non memes for you. But I'm sick of getting killed by bugs and this gave me something else to do for a while. :rolleyes:

Personally, I like the best of both worlds, a controller in one hand and a mouse in the other. Mind you, Dayz has so many keys I have the keyboard in the middle for some random extra stuff too. My PC is connected to a 51 inch tv that I sit 8 ft from on the sofa/couch, a wireless mouse, keyboard and controller means I can sit comfortably with my hands by my sides and keyboard on lap. This ensures adequate blood supply to the hands and fingers and cuts down on cramp and tightness which normally occurs after gaming for a long time while sitting at a desktop. The Keyboard and controller are both cheap logitech standard issue, the mouse is a 'Razor Mamba', a good mouse but not particularly worth the price tag and would be better with 'Naga' buttons on the side, which would reduce the need for the keyboard. I also have a Belkin n52te/Razor Nostromo which along with the Logitech G13 is a step in the right direction for morphing a contoller and a keyboard, but still far from where it'll end up. I reckon when Lepmis get 'Orthros' their single handed contoller to it's 3rd or 4th generation, the dayZ of using a keyboard with a mouse for FPS style games, could be numbered. Don't knock it until you've tried it. :D