Hetstaine

I love you. Seriously.

* winner winner chicken dinner ! To be able to place bricks and such above a slightly opened doorway would also be cool. I just hope we get more far reaching things than simple objects, like trap building and such, the whole baseball bat with nails deal that always comes up, it needs to be something you have to craft and not find as a loot item ..to gamey imo. So one will need a hammer as well.

Yes , a couple..i swore never again. But you know what happens to never say never..and who the hell is getting Het up without me knowing about it !

The field zeds are quite useless as the only thing they do is alert that a player is in the area. Been mentioned a stackton of times by many. The single worst feature of the patches since they were introduced imo. Sit in a forest near a pvp hotspot like Stary or NW field..wait for zeds to start popping up in a field which gives you an area to scope and find some poor bugger incoming from nowhere with a low tier weapon, pew pew pew. It makes all the sneaking up to a town virtually useless.

Welcome to the interwebz :)

I am sticking ty original plan of shooting/hatcheting/clubbing anyone with a helmet.

I,however, am a big time fan I however, am a big time fan I am, however, a big time fan I am a big time fan I am a big fan I am a fan I'm a fan I fan Fan *fan pic not included*

or you could just pretend that the person who wrote the diary/journal entry may have made a mistake. It's not like you are reading War and Peace ;)

I remember checking all four hospitals once back in June and came up zero except for bandages, All the fucking way to Berezino.

Part One Here I open my backpack and make sure The Dew is intact and not pierced from my mad rush out of Elektro. The Dew is fine and stares back at me insolently, i close my pack and shake my head in an attempt to dispel the vision of that terrible green and red can. I realise i am coughing like someone who has eaten Kamenkan sand for breakfast and am in dire need of antibiotics. I check my position, just north west of Elektro in the hills, i will make my heading Novy Sobor, first stop Pusta in hope of some food and drink. On my journey i hope to hunt 'The Big Five' of Chernarus : the long taloned beady eyed Chernogorsk chicken, the proud horned Balota Bull, the short haired goring Guglovo Goat, the thickly tusked Berezino Boar and the elusive but fearsome Rogovo Rabbit. If i can fell all five of these wild woodland beasts i may tip the scales of The Dew curse and push luck back onto my side. Heading off i cannot help but ponder my fate if i come across any of these beasts unprepared. I break through the trees above Pusta , scoping down across a softly blown sloping grass field, scanning the town below. No movement. I dash out of cover quickly, caring not for the noise i make as i crash loudly out of the underbush, my gutteral cough is uncontrollable and will alert anyone or anything for miles around I move across a dirt road that enters Pusta and scamper down into the grass on the other side..then it is on me, the Cherno Chicken springs out of the grass ninjalike, silent and feigning nonchalance as it awarkwardly struts parallel to me, its beady right eye jerking around madly, no doubt sizing me up. I take no chances and bring up my M4A3, then just as i am about to take the shot i hear the cry of the infected , coming at me from three different directions..me and the Cherno Chook in the middle, a triangle of death. If i take my eyes of the kfc escapee it will fly at me, feathers puffed and talons unleashed ! I surprise myself with my focus, everything moves like slow motion, as if i am underwater. With three crisp barks of my gun i have dropped the protectors of the chook, and before the chicken can leap and bring it talons to bear on me , i fell it with a headshot worthy of such a wild and untameable creature. Shaking, but still focused, i gut the feathery mess like Jaime Oliver on speed...afraid there may be more of his bretheren lurking amidst these wild grass plains. As i stack the juicy chickeness in my backpack i remembered a chicken we had as children, it was named Fingerlickin' because dad said that's how great it was going to taste when it was large enough to eat. We treated it as part of the family as one would a dog, cat or land dolphin, but Fingerlickin' had other ideas and was a leader, not a follower. It got to the point where nobody could enter the yard as Fingerlickin', now fully grown with a great proud dashing red cockerel, an oversize wingspan and flashing great talons, would charge rabidly when anyone entered the yard. Looking sideways with one eye locked on his prey he would leap at them when within range and let forth a hellish rooster battle cry. It got to the point where our yard was Fingers domain and people were forced to walk on the other side of the street, kids would run past screaming and even the largest sewer cats gave us a wide berth. Lonely times. Needless to say Finger went the way of the winchester when we gave him away to some people who lived on a farm. One afternoon he kept the lady of the farm trapped in the outhouse for two hours while her husband was in town, marching outside the door with his beady darting eyes taking in everything, daring her to make the twenty metre sprint to the farmstead. But i digress. Finding nothing in Pusta besides a small pile of firewood I trekked up to Vysoky Kamen and admired the monolithic rock formations, thinking that here would be a nice camping spot in pre apocalyptic times. Breaking out my map i decided to head to Mogilevka about a five minute run to the west, stashing the map away without glancing at The Dew i started my jog down the hillside. Halfway down in a break between the trees i spotted smoke in the distance, could it be...a heli wreck ? a better chance than Mogi for some meds. I broke into an excited run, hacking and coughing my way towards the downed machine. Several infected soldiers were limply dragging their feet around the smoking wreck, i dropped the closest one with several hits to the chest while his buddies, seemingly unaware, continued to mindlessly amble off in the distance. I crouched above the downed former soldier and rifled through his gear..yes! A small box of tablets in his top pocket, a remedy for my sickness. Saluting this once proud warrior i buried him according his service, faithful to the end in his duty to serve the public. I managed to mumble a few words above his grave as i stuffed tablets into my mouth, chewing frenziedly on them like pop candy and wishing i had a drink. Leaving the buried soldier behind I scoped the wreck but could see nothing else of value and quickly pulled my map out again, i would skip Moggy and head straight for Novy instead. It was heaven to not be coughing and drawing attention to myself anymore, and i felt nearly rejuvenated.. the dry tablets, although instantly curing me had soaked all the spit out of my mouth and my tongue was enlarged to the point i felt as if a tennis ball was lodged between my jaws. I swallowed my bitter remedy, slung my pack and headed for Novy. As i came over the brow of the hill above the heli i spotted an unmistakable shape...the Balota Bull in all of its brown glory was sauntering towards me, no doubt drawn by the sound of conflict and it's desperate primal urge to get in on the killing. Now the Balota Bull, though ferocious, is a slowish moving beast and i knew as long as i stayed away from its finely tuned horns and whiplash tail i had a better than even chance. I stood my ground as he approached, his mad eyes glistening as they fixed on me, then the beast charged ! or stumbled towards me slowly and i dived out of the way like a man possessed... ..bringing up my G17 and pumping a round into its flank, it moved on unaffected and i suddenly understood why this beast has garnered such respect amongst the big game hunters..i fired again and again, i fired until the tears streamed down my face and was screaming insanely DIE... JUST DIE YOU BEAUTIFUL MONSTER!! I shook myself out of my screaming teary madness and could hear the hammer of the gun slamming down in a repetitive click..click...click. I had put all seventeen rounds into it. The beast was finally down. I solemnly carved his rump and with my pre apocalyptic Sizzler™ knowledge produced a stack of 400g steak portions. Deciding my uncooked chicken could be a hazard to my health (also former Sizzler™ knowledge) i used my trusty matches to create a fireplace and had a cookout beside the Bull. Soothing his dead carcass with tales of great animal legends who had been put to pasture long before him and of his mighty Bison brothers he would soon be amongst. Here i also ate and regained my strength, the medium rare steaks partially curing my dry mouth. As i slowly arose to move out i spotted a white shape moving slyly above me, the Guglovo goat had entered the Bulls domain now that it was no longer the master of the area. Some said the goat been seen in cohorts with the bull although i had never witnessed them working as a team..but i am not wise in the wicked ways of wild animals. The goat could very well be Tonto to the Bulls Lone Rangerness. Not being able to withstand the anguish of a protracted battle with another fine four legged specimen i simply charged up and delivered the lead mercilessly. As i stood near its now bleatless body, i quivered in fear gazing upon it's mighty head rack, i wiped the sweat out of my eyes and reflected how unlucky i may have been had i not been so decisive. Once again my gutting prowess makes quick work of this short haired warrior and i rush down to my still lit fire with blood dripping fresh 350g goat medallions in hand and sizzle them to a just red in the middle medium. I wipe the blood off on the bulls mighty flank and use his tensile tail hair to floss my steak encrusted teeth, then i am up and running once again for Novy. Three of the fearsome Chernarus Five down, my cough a distant memory and my colour is off the scale. Life is good.

The continuing adventure is going to be painful...i logged in and my M4A3 CCO is gone and my G17 had no ammo. I opened my bag and my DMR is also missing, i think The Dew raped me. Hatchet time with the new 1.7.7 zeds..could be a short and sweet third instalment.

Couldn't have put it better myself Groover.

reminds me of the survivor tribal council setup

Damn heals

eat up or you will die :emptycan:

Ride the Lightning while it's hot man :D

Once per earth.

Once per earth. Once. Only one.

Nice work :thumbsup:

Ram it down !

Actually , i sort of believe you are missing the point. And that is certainly not a snappy line :)

...and the time invested in your char... Some may only care for the gear, but others, for the longevity of the character.

The day starts off lovely, i appreciate a stunning sunrise on my way to Stary, warming my cold bones whilst the the wakening birds are twittering crisply, ushering in the freshness of another apocalyptic dawn. Life is good, food is aplenty and i have coke, my trusty DMR for long range, an M4A3 cco for closer and a G17 for extreme close range lovin'. I pop into the house on the edge of Stary and realise shit is all set to go down hill.. I slide it's terrible unearthly metallicness into my pack and decide not to risk the tents, i will take it back to base camp and stash it, too many memories of bad runs with The Dew in my pack. Two minutes out of Stary and i spy smoke in the distance, heli wreck, up with the scope ..two guys just coming in and starting to loot it, one goes prone crawling around and one crouches near the tail. I am not worried, they are about 500 metres away, one has a winnie and one an akm. I watch them and have seen there is no hardcore weaponry there so leave them be. One of them looks my way, i am beside a rock in a field, but i see him pop out his 'nocs while his mate runs into the treeline beside , i am spotted. I do the QE and start to slowly move sideways. The akm barks off and bullets crack around me , then a couple hit me , bleeding, you idiots, what the hell are you doing ?!?! I bring up the dmr but before i can squeeze of a round i am felled with a broken bone. Hairy balls in my mouth! This dude with the akm knows his business, i start to bandage as i am bleeding out pretty quickly, shots pinging around me..knockout timer up, i slump into a retarded position on the ground. Up again, finish bandaging, scoff down my two bits of bacon and suddenly the dude with the winnie is on me pumping away from about twenty metres, one hits me and he takes five rounds to the face from my dmr, i suck down a morphine as he hits the dirt. Rebandage as i watch the akm guy who has busted cover and is coming at me, i can barely make him out at the edge of a white fog, shaking and panic breathing. I pump some rounds to make him zig zag and leg it in the opposite direction on zero blood. Five minutes ago i was as happy as Larry, fresh and colourful and enjoying the morning, now i am shaking, passing out every minute or so and running for my life across a black and white world. I turn and put some more ragged shots towards the akm guy who keeps on me, he turns and runs for cover, i sprint and run down a hill and into the safety of a gully and some trees, have a quick nap then up again. My legs don't stop pumping until i am near Zeleno, my narcolepsy is a recurring problem. Here i find a goat on the hill and after several more naps i finally manage to get a smidgen of colour back. Server restart is within the next thirty minutes so i decide to leg it to a heli spawn near Komerovo, then go cow hunting. Not a beast on the way to eat, even on the side of the hill between Kamenka/Komerovo where i have carved many a juicy fillet. Waiting on the hill near the lighthouse i see a suicider at the bottom near the steps and decide to check him out, see if he has any painkillers to get rid of my shakes...his sole possession is a flashlight, he has been raped of his bandages and painkillers. The apocalypse is a harsh tough world, and nothing is sacred. So while i am kicking back with this dead guy a bandit runs from around the front of the lighthouse and says hi.. I am like..hey..sup bandido, as i watch my m4 appear in his hands from my pack.I think, fuk it, take me now Dew Lord...and we look at each other for a few seconds. No gunfire breaks the staring silence and we become relaxed and chat it up, swap stories, he slides my gun back into my pack saying sorry , he is used to being shot instantly. I find out he doesn't know the international survivor handshake so i explain to him the qe deal and we talk about the Dew curse which he also knows nothing of. I explain to him the horror of The Dew and then tell him i have one on me...he laughs..my mouth does not even contain the hint of a smile. Things go weird and silent. I decide he is the Dew curse personified and is here to send me to Solnichniy beach via a shot to the skull or a leg glitching stare, just as i am about to pull a shaky trigger finger on this Dew demon from beyond he says, hey..can i hang with you until the chopper respawns ? The voices leave my head and i say sure, love to have you aboard. He says he wants to pick up a mate near Elektro and see if they can take out the sniper. I give him my M4 and we wait. Of course server restart comes up and we cannot log due to proximity. So restart, lose my skin because i murbered my attempted murderer (qq) but the heli is there..i ask him if he can fly by saying ' do you know which way is up ?' he answers ' George Washington ' , i am convinced he is the man for the job and lax back in the gunner seat. We heli off to pick his mate and then get some blood for me before we begin the hunt. His eyes, once again start the Dew demon voices. I smack my head on the dash and clear my head. We find his mate also airborne near Elektro in a Mil8 so we head to Skalisty first to check the other chopper spawn, which is also there, we have three choppers but decide to all bail into one and come back after i am blooded up and have hopefully nailed the sniper. I tell them to hover over the hospital, i will grab the blood pronto and then gtfo before sniper death. He ends up hovering on the outskirts so i think fuck it, who dares wins and bail out. Immediately on landing i am greeted by an Elektro citizen Bleeding again i skurry around some houses and start to bandage but no joy, old mate wants to give me the keys to the city.. I don't want them so he takes one to knee for the cause I run to bandage , again on zero blood..but still no joy.Jaime Hyneman wants to test the myth that one can survive indefinitely without blood Finally i get to bandage in one of the buildings opposite the office block and then get into the hospital, grab some blood and seriously think about dumping that Dew in one of the medical boxes, but i just can't part with it. Out again..get to da choppa motherfucka. as always in desperate life or death situations, i am overcome by a mad urge to just have a comfy little nap The chopper comes to my rescue and bandido dude bails with my M4, mowing down a bunch of zeds like Ron Jeremey gone run amok in a cathouse, i awake refreshed from my beauty nap and get into the chopper... ...Annnnnnnd then i'm out again waking up now more refreshed than Lindsay after a sleep under a nightclub table i proceed to protect my Dew.. Up and running as the chopper situation is going pearshaped I hear the chopper spool down as it slams into the ground and keep running away from the zeds, over direct shit is all over the shop , both of the other guys are bleeding and running after me, then bandido's mate is down, i turn and me and bandido jeremy are popping the zeds but his mate is down for good and turned into party favours. Bandido bandages himself and we blood each other but of course my blood doesn't take and i am still fucked up in black and white pass out world. Its like a typical friday night out. We bolt along the coast and score a set of wheels near the industrial area, i jump in and pass out like a bitch on the passenger seat while old cartoon eyes drives us away to refind his mate. This is when i realise i am also coughing and have no antibiotics. Bandido gives me a stern look and tells me to get my shit together I am finally blooded near Cap Golova, that feeling when the world pumps back into full life around you after so long, it has been a good hour in black and white land and constantly riding zero blood, just need some ab's and i am back. His mate ends up being near Elektro so we turn around and hightail it back to the action but bandido puts the car into the fence at the firestation poppin' a tyre so we bail out hooking up inside with his mate. I decide to call it quits and part with a quick qe then head for the hills to log, dew and life still intact. The Dew has been defeated this time.