Hetstaine

Can i get a tank ?

Got bored last night because i could not join any servers for more than 5 minutes before BE not responding, so anyway i threw a bunch of my shit together and chucked it up here http://jimeezstuff.weebly.com/ for your perusal, you know, for those times when you are bored fuckless at work. Just go to the dayz tab..obviously :) cheers.

Cheers guys :D If i didn't write i would be out there with a hatchet beheading people in a rage ;)

Was pretty cool despite the shortcomings and glitches. My partner and i watched some at home then the rest at an internet cafe when we went out, we ended up with a small crowd of people behind us watching, some who logged in and watched it on other pcs nearby ...and they had never even heard of Dayz ! Was very cool and we look forward to the next event. Bonus item..although the concept was cool the movie sucked elephant trunks and the dayz version was far more enjoyable.

I have seen Bear Grylls die on US 352 , 7-10 times in a session. I don't think he did the transition from TV to gaming very well. Maybe he is not used to all the beans. But yes..that is an unfuckingcanny resemblance. Rocket Grylls.

Another session in dayz with many ups and downs.US352 15-30 people on, daylight. My mate has got all jumpy as he is ( was.. *snicker*) at 33 dayz alive. We jumped on, i was near Balota on the hill as i had been stalking two snipers the previous night ( never got them) and he was at Skalisty. We decided to work our way along the coast and meet east of Cherno. I make it to the military tents..bang bang dead. Never even saw him. He swims over while i load back in. Spawn West of Cherno and i make it to the hospital, grab some morph when a chick ( 40 year old guy with no clothes on and eating cheetos) spots me, I am crouched and say hey , whats up ? This gravelly voice goes 'heeeeey,,hey, come here'. I just blankly stare from about 2 metres..yeh right dude. You want my bandage that bad, you are going to have to come and get it..Bang bang i'm dead, enfield in face. That was imaginative. Bzzzzzz flies. Spawn at Elektro, my mate is coming through Kamyshovo. Run to the firestation, fly blown place it is, score an empty akm. From the top of the station i spot a bandit crawling near the shops and keep tabs on him, my mate makes the outside of Elektro. I call out the where the bandit is while he stalks him. He takes a shot and misses and the bandit bolts into the church. Zeds follow and the bandit caps them at the doorway, my mate waits a few seconds then leans in and pops him. Sweet. I head down. I am grabbing the bandits gear when my mate shouts out that he is being shot. Bam , he is dead. I turn having grabbed an enfield but not reloaded and see a chick shooting from the left side of the church near a pew (pew pew) i am hit and bolt for the door reloading just making it around the corner when i am taken down. Flies. Spawn down the beach from Elektro while my mate is stuck at loading. I make it back to the church and get inside, both our bodies are gone but there is a winnie on the floor near the bandit , i grab it then hear footsteps, i look around and a crazy axe fucker is on me and swinging, broken legs, i get a shot off but miss and then i am dead...bUZZZZzzzzzzz. Spawn at the East of Cherno. Make it to the barn on the outskirts and grab an axe, head outside and there is a car parked nearby, i zoom in..dude just getting out of it in camo clothes with an akm. He say's hi , we talk briefly and he lays down an akm and two mags for me then asks if i want the car. I say sure and drive off happy with my new shiny object. I knew giving away that tractor and m1911 to a random would come back to me. My mate is still cut over losing his best char to date and wanting revenge, i tell him we have wheels and we can go back to Elektro if he wants. He is livid and not enjoying my laughter. He spawns West of Komarovo so i head down to pick him up. Just past the military tents near Balota i hear someone over direct and look around. On my right is a bike and to the left of me a hilux has pulled up alongside. They tell me to pull over, i think, meh..why not. So i pull up and they flank me. He is pointing an m107 at me and says "get out of the car , lay down and drop your weapon!" i get out and drop the akm then lay down. He pops a round into the ground which of course gets zeds inbound, his mate takes them out and then they order me onto the bike. I jump on the back and say ok..what now dudes ? They ask where i am from and we engage in some small talk, chit chatter shit dont matter type stuff. The guy walking around gets in my wheels and drives them to the side of the road then unloads into it, destroying my ride. Fuckers :D Then just when i think we are ready to go to wherever the fuck they are planning to take my sorry ass he pops me one. I get off the bike bleeding and broken ..zeds start attacking again so i start bandaging in the middle of the road. The dude is saying something but i can't understand him then he walks up and caps me in the head. Maybe my bandaging skills pissed him off. Is that flies i hear ? Spawn at Elektro. My mate who has been hitting up some chick on facebook decides he has a better chance of getting some kicks there so he bails and i think ok, i will call it a night as well. Just before i log i am up over the ocean and falling, i hit the ocean and hear flies. THE FLIES !!

I jump between about three US servers depending on if we want night or day action so i will keep a look out for you Demon :)

In my new style of play it has become regular :) You warm my heart :D Bad yes..but also amusing. I decided to give away my whole old play style which was full survival. After loads of scriptee kills and my love of The Dew and then always the close following fatality i changed my dayz outlook. The only thing i carried over was my not shoot on sight mentality so i have befriended quite a few random's, run in some cool newspawn groups, met and talked to a few scriptees, been bandit raped aplenty and kos by most i meet even when unarmed. Noty throwing the game in as i love the whole concept , just letting loose for a while. From tonight now that my mate has died we are playing 'bait the baddies' style. I will be the bait unarmed ( axe in backpack) and he will sit back hidden and kill those that kill me when i try and make contact. We have a couple of tents worth of supplies on our home server at Skalisty that we will ferry over so we can set up an inland base camp close to the pvp hot spots an go kos killing, should be fun :) US352 in about 6 hours (6pm est) if you see a dude called Jerescapee (long story) then say g'day and i will give you a bandage :D

I would hunt you down and force you to listen to Enrico Palazza..all day.Then cut you slowly.

All of the bold. Atmosphere over loot.

Fucking rabbits.

Why is there easily accesible elephant porn on the net ? I don't know...it just is.

I would imagine Rocket knows rule number 1 of the interwebz, specifically forums . No forget and never forgive, besides those old gems..i (every internet user ever) am never wrong and my opinion is the best and only. And Fraggle godammit , you have inspired me to go and play some dayz right now because i simply cannot spend all night laughing at your posts man ! :beans:

Great to see you posting a bit again, especially in the one line thread..but i think Fraggle has something that he needs answered about the standalone. Go on Fraggle..tell him about the Swans, don't be shy ;)

If i laugh anymore i am going to start spitting swan all over my keyboard.

If you mean a scripter turning himself into a dog and barking in a netherlands accent ? Yes. see here.. http://dayzmod.com/forum/index.php?/topic/90761-a-bandit-axe-guy-hero-camo-man-and-a-short-journey/#entry854120

I would buy the shirt ;) Everyone is invited to Fraggle's for dinner , just remember it is byo , i heard he gets nasty if you even so much as look at his drink cabinet. Don't touch Max's hookers either.. not that you would want to ;)

Clearly death by a blunted and rusty instrument is all above board old chap, teeth and all that gnarling and gnashing though..just not right.

I am really liking your line of thinking today ..please continue :D

I don't know how to reply to that excepting to say the obvious, or as Rocket would say..'Heckers'. Authentic :D ..i am starting to put two and two together here Fraggs , you did read Matt's posted link yeah ? ...of course you did. You know before Fraggle started the whole swan thing i never thought i would ever enter 'Queen eats Swan' into google, and on a side note , is Fraggle anywhere near Alvaston Park ?

Damn hey. Our pm is lucky to get fish and chips.. that may, or may not be fish :D I wonder who plucks the swans ? that's the cream job right there lol. Official Swan plucker, to the Queen. What a title. I bet you she goes straight for the necks too, bloody Queens. You can't even get a decent chook over here that is any bigger than a starving pigeon and she is off eating swans. My mind is semi boggled.

...plus swans are tasty ;)

Thanks for the laugh..it's been a long painful day at work :thumbsup:

That first pic of you is wicked :)

I dupe myself 42 times on a server to make it look full. That way noone comes in because of expected hacking on high pop servers. Then i collect shiny things.