Pandafish

It starts with the usual growls: the feline handled roughly by thescruff. The Cat Strangler is at it again. A slight struggle, a practice squeeze and others methods ofimpersonal handling, and off he goes. The neighborhood collectivelyshrugs its shoulders in hope of shutting out the yeowls and the hissesstretched into high pitch by the Cat Strangler's strong, trained hands. Parents turn up their televisions; children pull pillows over theirheads to the point of suffocation. Neighborhood pets break intoinstinctual runs and flee into unfamiliar territory, their nametags andphone numbers their only hope of return. The Cat Strangler continues his performance. The neighbors call theauthorities, but the authorities stammer helplessly---they've been overall this before (the pulling up, the getting out, the knocking on thedoor, the being met with the Cat Strangler's cat-strangling credentials,backed with University patronage). For what few seem to hear under the barrage of kitty torture is theCat Strangler's wife, Jill, in accompaniment (tonight: Heinrich IgnazFranz Von Biber, Sonata for Violin and Basso Continuo in C Minor). Noone bothers appreciating how a firm grip on the neck and harsh pull ofthe tail make a perfect B flat, how a good squeeze produces a high E. Instead, psychiatrists will be consulted---tears will be shed. Parentswill explain to the children the wrongdoings of the Cat Strangler's artform; they will recite scripture; they will make moral imperatives.Animal activists will lick bloodlust from their lips and draw up plans ofattack. Far off in distant, political lands, untouched by the screams ofdying cats but active just the same, government agencies will do thevoodoo they do. Nothing will remain the same. But for now, the recital ends---to no applause. Jill, the Cat Strangler's wife, critiques the performance. Siamese,she believes, have too harsh an overall tone for something as technicallyprecise as Biber. For the Russians, fine (for Schnittke, forShostakovich, even Tchaikovsky), but for the Germans she is more inclinedtowards the longhairs. The Cat Strangler makes hurried notes---such a landmark work will hisbe! His professors had little hope for Musica Zoocidia beyond classroomexperimentation, and they certainly never dreamed of using animals wilderthan your typical laboratory rat. The Cat Strangler's treatise willbreak all confines! He sees a future in pig concertos---nay, even a dayfor the Echo Sonata for Himalayan, Chihuahua and Ostrich. He transports the spent instrument in a brown paper bag inunceremonious fashion. He takes it to a deep wood, as far as his carwill allow, and empties the bag onto a pile of expired brethren, catspiled upon cats piled upon cats piled upon cats, tongues stuck out instrangulation horror. The pile writhes in minute, maggot-infestedrhythm. When the Cat Stranlger departs, waiting minions of sportingequipment manufacturers raid the pile of former felines for the making oftennis rackets. These rackets are placed into the able hands ofstrong-bodied, gleaming white tennis players, who swing into furiousvolleys for game.

the strangler demands it

DONT POLLUTE THE PRECIOUS CANADA NO

i think they are all down? im not seeing any servers, just 2 dev servers passworded

i cant seem to understand what you are saying

DAYZ WILL NEVER BE IMPROVISE TO SURVIVE THAT'D BE TOO EASY NOW

enlightened by their presence

wait you can read books in dayz?

berezino is scary, everyone wants to kill you there i have yet to kill another player with bullets.. my first victim was some swedish brawler i beat his head in with a pipe wrench untill i was subdued by a band of construction workers to get my ttsko jacket

hopefully the animals arent broken like the zombies are..

if you have been ingame for 6 or 7 hours and still sick from food poisoning after consuming charcoal tabs (not antibiotics) then its probably a bug

Food Poisoning: Consume Charcoal tablets. The sickness status will remain for a few minutes, but the food poisoning effects will cease.

i think the real problem is that you need a drink..

im running heavily modified custom cfg files and all low settings its actually somewhat fluent, i get about an average 20-40fps my computer is pretty crap so its all i know :P

i didnt know dayz was a dressup simulator plus dont you usually ditch your spawn clothes after like finding a coat 5 minutes later?

zombieless dayz would be cool i only have played sa so all i know is them being broken and phasing through walls i can see how the world fell in the first place.. the only safe place would be high ground because they clip through the stairs!

i was looking at some of the pictures for the mosin rifle and what it looks like camo'd.. but i was wondering why the black version has a black magazine looking thing under it, whereas all the other versions dont. is this just an oversight or intentional? its just a minor thing but i was curious

my dad used a pringle can as a silencer he used the styrofoam wrapping on apples to coat the inside of it,and filled it with all sorts of shit all you hear is the mechanics of the weapon

my computer is a gateway nv59 Desktop or laptop? Notebook (laptop) Monitor resolution: 1366 x 768 CPU: Intel i3 Graphics card: 5650 Mobility Radeon RAM: 4GB SSD? (Yes/No) No

aiming for the head is hard for me.. 1st person i only use for shooting and looting, 3rd person is meleeing and fleeing.

the only weapon i think that should be added is a nicer shotgun.. like a pump or spas everything else that should be added is already similar to pre-existing weapons, so i personally dont see the point

maybe it's foreshadowing for mosin inbuilt magazines to be removed! gasp everyone spray your mosins black

i like looting houses and getting chased by zombies

i found a riders jacket in a military barracks i almost kept my old raincoat just cuz of the stupid 4x1 layout.. but i liked the black coat. its rare? too bad it might get wiped cuz its on my experimental char

i found like 3 of those scopes unaware of their value and mindlessly chucked them all pristine i believe? long range