ch33s3p00f

So I was scavenging Balota with nothing but a 1911 with 3 magazines, when a group of two friendlies who had just met up before and were teaming to go loot Cherno came up behind me... I still had the Bandit Mask on from last night, so trust was an issue here and even though they let me join their group, they traveled with me in the middle. When we finally reached the outskirts of Cherno everyone stopped for a drink and food break before our big looting spree. To break the ice and hopefully gain the trust of my comrades I proceeded to tell a joke over direct chat, the conversation went exactly like this. Me,"So, three strangers are wandering the world during the zombie apocalypse when two of them suddenly drop dead. Who was the traitor?" At that moment I took aim and fired 4 shots, in quick succession knocking both of them unconscious. As they lay there I lined up my head shots and silently said,"Me," over direct chat as I finished them both off.

You see... The thing is.. When bandits come... You won't know when, and you won't know how... But we are coming, and the last thing going through your head, will be a .243 through the dome... The last thing out will be the excrement leaving your rectum as you lay in a pool of your own brain matter and blood...