Katalepsis

Fixed, although to be 100% honest (and to be fair) I wrote every single word with the absolute certainty that someone exactly like you would reply [exactly as you did]. Also, I was assuming this to be in the Bug Report thread, which I was given a link to.

I'm still having two huge issues as follows: I get "Authentication timeout" kicked about 80% of my attempts to log in (empty new server, stale server with plenty of existing population, doesn't matter). The worst part is it puts me on 5-minute cool down timer despite it not being my fault that I'm dropped.Here are more details: if I'm going to get kicked, friends do not see me in the in-game player list nor in the "friends" column in the server lobby.If I don't have them on to give me that tidbit, I also know I'm about to get this error/kick by checking my desynch upon logging in, whereupon it'll stay at 100000 and within 8-25 seconds I'm kicked for "Authentication timeout" as it were.If I keep trying (after many undeserved cool down spawn timers mind you) I finally get lucky and "stick" and get to log in and stay in and play.I've heard over 2-3 years of Google posts that it could be Steam related, but it's limited strictly to DayZ and started magically about 7-8 days ago out of nowhere. I die almost never, six* times since joining a month ago (first from starvation as a newbie, second and third from someone who I watched materialize nearby and shoot me at the main SW airbase, and times four, five, and six by glitching through walls at the shipwreck [twice] and Devil's Castle and falling outside, also a fun bug that makes me laugh and cry at the same exact time). Nonetheless, each of these six times I got "You are dead" upon trying to respawn, only to keep loading in at "You are dead" over and over, after which I'd finally try another server following 10-20 failures to respawn properlyAt that point, I'd then get a mix for the next 30-40 login attempts of "You are dead" and "You are unconscious" with some infinite "Please wait" thrown in for good measure. The last time it happened (two days ago) I tried over 125 times to play after falling and dying (not unconscious mind you, but dead).The only way I could get back into DayZ after 3-hours of this bug (again, from simply dying) was to alter my character's sex to female and save the template. I was then immediately allowed to spawn properly on the coast as a n00b and play on.Also note I did log out of both DayZ and even Steam (many times) and a few times even stepped away for 30-60 minutes, and even rebooted my system, all to no avail until the character sex change and save.Dying puts many of us into a completely bugged state where it can take all sorts of attempts to log in, reboot, switch servers (etc) just to get back in the game from simply dying. The death/respawn bug...is not fixed.I'd truly like to get these two issues noted and then resolved (which many of my friends also experience, especially #2 as it seems I'm the only victim of #1 in my circle of DayZ friends). The "Authentication timeout" kick I get 70-80% of my login attempts is frustrating at this point, because if I get it after loading into the game (never lasting more than 25-seconds btw) it hits me with the 5-minute server hopping penalty. Most of the time though I get the timeout popup error message while I'm counting down on the very spawn cool down timer I reference!! Insanely frustrating :) otherwise we LOVE this game! Keep up the great work and I hope this helped. Here's more relevant info: ~22MBps connection speed with ~31ms ping (trace routes run again to confirm no major network issues betwixt me and some known DayZ server addresses) Physically connected to my modem via router, all hardware the same and operating flawlessly since September 2011 (no other gaming or network issues, DayZ only, and no problems with DayZ of any kind until last week out of nowhere)

Freaking love the Sealab 2021 reference, flawless victory. http://video.adultswim.com/sealab-2021/there-can-be-only-none.html

Ah right that's another thing, I had a "pristine" everything (except food stuffs) and magically my .45 pistol, a .45 clip, and my TSoK pants went right to "ruined" out of nowhere todayas well. I wasn't having the timeout error either my first 2-3 sessions but now it's 100% of the time suddenly.

Today I'm getting kicked 100% of sessions after ~25 seconds for "authentication timeout" regardless of what server I pick, and the boots are penalizing me with the log-in cooldown timers as well. Double whammy. FYI!