Death By Crowbar

At 7:07 the guy with the mask and the voice changer is absolutely hilarious, I just spit my drink out!

There's sometimes where I'll use binoculars and just watch what people do in towns from safety afar. I've witnessed some pretty messed up stuff...

So, tonight I died and spawned in some town I'd never seen before. That was fine, there were 2 other fresh spawns there and we did some fresh spawn meelee and ended up allowing each other to go our separate ways. This town was in a cove by the water somewhere with a bunch of train tracks that went nowhere, lots of rocks and trees around, etc. So trying to find my way out I take a random smaller paved road, and keep following that to a coast. I then turn left and follow that coast. Now I'm in the middle of NOWHERE, a grassland wasteland with no trees for as far as the eye can see. There is literally nothing around, anywhere, except for the coast and barren grassland. Where. Am. I? Holy hell I have no idea... and no map.

I tried my hand at banditry. I found a spot where, with binoculars, I could see literally forever and there was no risk of someone sneaking up on me. So when someone passed by: Fresh spawns - I would question them, hand them some opened food, and allow them on their way. Semi gearned - I *might* handcuff them, question them, joke with them, but ultimately I'd send them on their way. Well geared guys (solo) - The guys I would approach with an ethical issue of what to do, true heroes always passed and went about their way with no issue. However, people trust issues or true bandits whole somehow fail this test and either he'd end up dead, or I'd end up dead, or we'd both end up dead cursing each other over direct chat.My favorite was randomly running out of nowhere with "harlem shake" blasting to see how people would react. I'd say about 25% laughed and got that it was fun, 50% tried to ignore me and just keep running, and maybe 25% found it offensive and attacked me. I'd consider myself a hero bandit and not really a bandit bandit. If there was no aggression everyone survived and went about their ways. If someone showed any aggression I'd assume they were one of "those guys" and would react accordingly. I'm certainly not, nor have ever been, KOS. KOS is not fun or fulfilling in DayZ, this is not HL2 Deathmatch afterall.

Just sayin', but if the jump randomly sounded like Mario and the animation had one fist in the air that would be hilarious. But only randomly when you least expect it.

Zombies that don't travel in right angles (or very obviously calculated angles) will make for greater challenge, they might not take derpy routes around structures or only attack you in a straight line and then stand there dumbfounded when you merely step out of the way. This sounds promising! I wonder how the community as a whole who's used to truly "dumb" zombies that are easy to deal with will respond? Positively I hope...

A few times I've tried to survive on nothing but Tactical Bacon. Mmmm... bacon.

I used to get some very frustrated with this. But then I realized a few things (partially from experience partially from what people say on the boards here): Sometimes it happens and there's nothing you can do about it. I used to want to steak and throw things and would come at the forums like a bull in a China shop, but I've moved on to acceptance at this point. Where you camp can help - sometimes a zed may have been chasing you for miles and you might not even know it. Always camp on the 2nd floor of a building or wait at least 10 minutes before camping if you're in the middle of nowhere. On high pop servers, never camp where you're obviously found. I camped on the roof of a hospital last night and when I hopped on this morning to play for an hour I was confused to find my 6 slot pants, gun, and tactical vest all gone, but everything else was intact. I was obviously looted after I logged (either that or there's a new bug that got me, it's more likely some one looted me after I logged but was kind enough to not kill me).I try to stick to a few servers I'm comfortable with as well these days. I used to jump on any random server that was daylight and not empty.

I've been sorta keeping mental notes on the various types of DayZ SA players I've encountered or the type that I've transitioned through. The thought on this goes back to a common transition diagram for hunters that was shared with me when I was little - this isn't meant to show the transitions from one player type to another, it's merely meant to document/describe those which I've seen to date, and solicit feed back (additive, humorous, etc) on what others have seen. Here goes - my best stab at the various breeds of DayZ SA players I've seen (in no particular order): The newb - often appearing as fresh spawns and randomly geared, often looting houses that have clearly already been looted and running for dear life from zeds, and getting killed by them because they've not discovered double tapping W to run faster. The sniper - this guy is holed up somewhere, you may not ever discover where, ready to pick off anyone who wanders by. After trying my hand at this I have concluded these people have a LOT of time on their hands, because even on servers with 40 people you often can wait an hour or more before someone wanders by. The comedian - this guy will do any sort of random or crazy thing for attention. They commonly streak past you blasting music acting totally crazy, and in general they're harmless and seem to be looking to make the apocalypse a more enjoyable place. The aggressive or vengeful - this guy is having a bad day, or is a jerk, or is drunk, or just plain sucks. They attack everyone they see, KOS is their only way of life, regardless of how they're geared. The fresh spawn zerg wave - this is a fun group to be a part of when it happens. Running along the coast after a recent wave of collective bad luck, these survivors understand they have nothing, and nothing to lose. Typically at least one of them will know where jerk bandits are with gear or some highly geared people are defending an area, and a rare but beautiful event will unfold, anywhere from 3 to a dozen or more rough fresh spawns will decend onto a target and mayhem will ensue. The gear collector - to this guy, gear is everything. He will go to great lengths to avoid conflict, even so far as to play on servers where he is the only player. This guy is going to completely fill every inventory slot, will spray paint his guns, color coordinate his gear, and search for pristine everything. He may even have a press vest. This makes him fulfilled. When he gets killed, he is very likely to bitch on the boards because he spent days gearing up avoiding conflict only to lose it all - likely without even getting a chance to fire a shot out of one of his many shiny customized guns. The seal team 6 member - this guy is part of a group that often plays together, They coordinate well, and don't fear the airfields (in fact they often occupy and defend them). They're well geared, but even if not well geared they're well coordinated and will be well geared in no time. These guys are part of a pack and loyal to their pack. They're typically not like a pack of wolves hunting people down though - they defend their position and may allow fresh spawns to pass through. The hostage taker(s) - these guys THRIVE off use of handcuffs, and will do anything they can to get someone cuffed and force feed them until they throw up. They often have multiple disinfectant bottles in inventory. They may or may not also take pride in torturing their prey. They can act in groups, but sometimes they're lone wolves. The highway patrol - this guy is likely a loner. He waits at a vantage point on a highway with a high powered scope or binoculars looking for anyone to pass through. Trust me, he sees you well before you have any idea you're being watched. When his prey is about to pass, one of several things may happen - ranging from merely stopping and questioning his prey and allowing them to escape, he may simply create a corpse pile, he may randomly blast "Harlem Shake" and start following you, etc. This guy is looking for attention and doesn't take major risks. The "Knockout Game" guy - this guy believes in the way of the fist. If you have a helmet, you're safe and he'll avoid you... but anyone else he will go out of his way to try to "one time" you down, either to take your gear, kill you, or merely to run off laughing about how he knocked you out. The Hero(es) - these guys, are, awesome, and rare. They inquire about where aggressive bandits are, will play body guard roles for fresh spawns, will hand out gear/food, and are generally excellent survivors attempting to make the world a better place. The crazy rednecks - I ran into this for the first time tonight, a pair of dudes with dogs barking in the background of their mics and as I ran past they're were like, "Hold up, boy, I need to talk to you! Slow down, son, I'll shoot!" They literally sound like a pair of guys in a trailer park in Georgia somewhere that will rape you and feed you to an alligator. You can almost hear the banjo and the song from "Deliverance". The hacker - this guy has super powers. From unlimited ammo clips and bugged gear to the ability to teleport and shoot through walls. This guys sucks and is the ultimate equalizer. May god smite him in his sleep. The female player - yes, they do exist. In the words of one I saw documented on YouTube, "Don't make it weird guys" The "friendly friendly friendly" guy - more often than not, this guy has nothing and is actually friendly. He realizes that you likely have nothing as well and where there's no reward there's no risk that's worth taking. He may want to simply go about his way, or he may want to stick with you for a bit (strength in numbers), or he may be bored/lonely and want human interaction that he's been lacking IRL, or it's very possible he's plotting for the right moment to kill you. The bait and the bandit - I hate these guys. Someone plays bait, and there's all different variants of this, from appearing as a fresh spawn, to an actual fresh spawn that's simply trying to stay alive and not get killed by the bandit, to someone who got taken hostage and cuffed into being bait, to not even a player but merely gear dropped on the road somewhere. This ahole bandit will use bait to lure in prey and gun them down. They're scum, but very crafty and sneaky scum. The woodsman - these guys are very interesting. They'll head inland, WAAAAY inland. They'll explore mountain slopes, logging trails, tiny towns in ravines, they'll drink out of any pond/stream they can find, they follow power lines and not roads, they stick to the tree lines, they're very cautious. You might not even realize they're around, but they're out there. They're typically not looking for trouble, they're merely looking to see the world and survive. These guys will benefit a lot more when additional features are implemented such as being able to kill wildlife and cook in the woods. The deathmatch guy - this guy is out for blood, and measures success in death to kill ratio. He wishes this was Quake or Halflife and that the match would end at the first guy to 50 kills. He's not really a douche, he just wants to kill everyone he can... because he can. The submissive - this guy is unbelievable. You approach him and he either puts his hands up or lays down displaying that he's no threat. He may even do this while fully geared hoping you're friendly. This guy has a good heart and dies a lot, but for whatever moral/ethical reasons plays the game in a way that makes him feel better inside as a person. The stoner - these guys are all over the map. The only reliable thing is that they're amusing on their mic and often confusing keys or AFK a bunch. Oddly as loyal as they can be to group with they're terribly unreliable. The night owl - a rare breed that cares to play at night. These guys use skills most of us don't care to develop, but they have an appreciation for things the rest of us completely avoid - imagine a server with 40 people during the night without the gamma exploit. That could be a lot of fun! The beggar - this guy, LOL, this guy is hoping people are kind at heart and not heartless assassins. He'll approach you begging for food, weapons, basically anything you can spare to get rid of. He knows he's got a 75% chance of success, and a 25% chance of waking up on the coast and running to the next person he finds. The overall odds are better on a high pop server than houses that have been already picked clean by looters.What type's have you been? What types have you seen that I've missed?

I'm sure someone else has run into this but I can't find any posts about it. I just died, and got back to my corpse. However, I cannot loot it for some reason? Is this a known issue?

I managed to find my way back into that obscure town. I think I may have headed north until the world nearly ended. I nearly starved and turned back around... Beware of the hole to hell under the ocean!

I mean, look at this wasteland! Nothing for miles!

Yeah... this was what it looked like. I also found the pit of dispair in the ocean.

Well, 2 things. It was on a hill. And it was barely 10 minutes (if that). What's the timer? Uhhh... so much running for no reward! DayZ how you torment me!!! Then 2 zeds who were following me nearly killed me while posting this. I'm sure they were miles behind me but somehow tracked me down out of spite.

Interesting that you use a ping to wait 5 seconds. I suppose that works...

Anyone else experiencing this? I go to switch servers (spawned into low pop and wanted more action) and I wait my 199 seconds, but then when it's about to load it sits on "Please wait..." and never actually loads. I've been sitting here waiting for 5 minutes and nothing. I end up having to try another server. I did a search but didn't see where anyone had talked about this, anyone else have this happen?

Zeds make better doors than windows...

I bumble around the few places I know have axes or some sort of weapon and then see where it goes from there. I might survive to gear up and find some friendlies to team up with - but more often then not I get shot when I least expect it. My favorite is grouping with a bunch of random fresh spawns and zerging the nearest geared up person with bare fists!

I stopped to help a fresh spawn out once, was going to give him a spare (loaded) hand gun that I needed to get rid of. While looking in my inventory he bare fisted knocked me out. I wear bike helmets a lot more often these days...

Running

So I stumbled upon this a while back (forget if I saw it on the boards here or on Kotaku or what), it's almost like visual poetry: http://heyareyoucool.tumblr.com/ And from there I also found this, which is pretty neat as well and showcases how good the game can look: http://apocalypsepolaroids.tumblr.com/ Are there any other good fan sites out there or Youtube channels in particular that are good to subscribe to? There seems to be a lot of Youtube activity but I'm having trouble weeding through what is good/funny vs what could be 30 minutes of watching the equivalent of paint drying. This one that Kotaku posted a few days ago was hilarious: http://kotaku.com/when-dayz-becomes-a-horror-movie-1567638443 Basically I'm looking for what else is out there that's good/funny that I'm missing. Some of this stuff is hilarious...

I've got to dig up the server name, but about 8 survivors randomly running into each other with no gear all zerged a couple geared up guys that had been picking people off in Benizzio(sp?). That was mad fun... I was the yellow jacket guy with no mic and no gear (DontShootMeBro!). That was mad fun! Anyone else in that group survive? Did we take the sniper out?

I think this pick only shows 6 of us, but there were at least 8 who randomly joined up and tried to take out a sniper and a jerk or 2 with M4's or mosins who were mowing unarmed survivors down. That was a lot of fun! http://cloud-2.steampowered.com/ugc/3318336211333649109/89A505DF1B6B0DC709B08529C06AFC9F3112F942/

Every time I submit to a robbery I ultimately get tortured and killed. So lately I've just been running for dear life if I'm not armed well enough to put up a fight.

I agree. In my opinion poop and vehicles are equally problematic, but equally as interesting.