strangelyquiet

You do realise that's the Cerne Abbas Giant? Everyone knows this, right?

Alternatively you have can have a quick pre-game bout of 'hand to hand combat' to warm yourself up (possibly two, depending on how energized you are).

Young children who dress the prostitutes? That's an oddly specific job.

Then I believe the t'interwebs people would call this a Failed Epic, or some such. Yes, the world is a very bad place. But I'm not sure challenging spoof posters on a niche zombie apocalypse forum board is gonna make that much difference to the plight of the dispossessed.

Good. It warms my heart to see the newbie revenged. Your buddy says to an obviously unarmed newbie "we told you not to come any closer but you carried on talking" and shot him. Well, that's reasonable behaviour. Then the big god of Karma comes down from on high and wreaks his terrible vengeance :)

Tedious Tiresome Repetition.

That's eleven. And a terrible way to sum up the game.

For me DayZ is summed up by the random thoughts and reflections you have as you jog around the map or hide out from other survivors, such as... Yip. Cowboy Hats Is Cool Right.... Die Pesky Wabbit Die Can I Spraypaint My Kiwi? That's Me Safe And... *Bang* But I Logged Out Safely!

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scostman all go to the pub. The barman says 'what'll you be having gents?' The Englishman goes first, and orders a pint of London Pride. The Irishman goes next and orders a pint of Guinness. And then the Scotsman orders a pint of McEwan's. The three men then subsequently had a very convivial evening. Jokes aren't really my thing.

What *is* going one with all these '...' ? Have they introduced keyboards now that now have ... in place of the . ?

That's the kind of attitude that really helps. I think it was the philosopher Wittgenstein who said 'If man wishes to be taken seriously, then serious he must take things'. Or maybe it was Miley Cyrus, I dunno.

4. I try mediation. Even the rotting undead have feelings and currently there is no way of facilitating *their* concerns. We need some sort of outreach centre or rehabilitation programme. After all it's the end of the world and they're going to be feeling confused, anxious and a little bit dead. Like all conflicts, the path back to harmony is by engaging in constructive dialogue. I get eaten every time.

That's the point, I don't think everyone is here for that reason. I would guess the OP, and many people like him or her, are here because the want to play a game and don't give any thought to the testing process or the purpose of the alpha. They then feel entitled - see it in the first post - the argument goes 'I paid real money and by god I shouldn't have to put up with this.' It's selective on their part - they enjoy the access they get, but don't wish to put up with all the downsides that come with it.

Well, two.

Only if I can then have a 'poke bayonet through keyhole' option.

... would like to meet similarly geared zombie apocalypse survivor for cocktails and night's in. Non smokers, pet lovers and own car a must.

That's just what I do sometimes, especially if I've recently run into some players I didn't like the look of. This serves two purposes - I clear weapons out of their way so they can't get me until I'm long gone, and they're also there if I die and spawn close enough to run round and pick them up. In fact I've started doing this tactically - finding a safe spot, leaving my backpack, heading into town to grab some food and drink and then returning. I notice far less people go after me when I don't look geared and if I do get taken out all my gear is not available to them (and possibly is to me if I get there in time). The downside is you need to pick your spot - I once left a full backpack and weapons under a tree only to be unable to pick them up again when I returned. D'oh!

Sorry, I've gotta disagree here on two points. 1) The only proven fact is that a child will die without food and water. You can live to a ripe old age without affection and attention. That's a fact, and one of those funky scientific ones. 2) More seriously - I think you have a misguided idea of what would happen. An extinction event would lead to the breakdown of civil society. Without the rules, both legal and moral, that glue our lives together, day to day life would break down very quickly. What's much more likely is that society would go through a period of extreme breakdown where the need to survive would trump all else for most people. I do think though that there's a chance that after a certain period of time survivors would begin to come together to rebuild what they have / stay alive. But that would come later. History is littered with the corpses of failed / collapsed societies. The Hittites, Olmec, Anasazi, Indus Valley Civilisation and the societies of Easter Island, the Polynesian Pitcairns and Greenland Norse to name just a few. A number of experts in the field hypothesize about future societal collapse - almost none support the argument that the beginning would be anything other than civil warfare as society fell apart. OP - have a read around the subject it's fascinating stuff. And the golden rule of thumb? - we only learn about the future by learning from the past.

They seem to be. Was I imagining it or is this happening now? I've just used up three lives fighting off hordes I collected up by running through Berezino.

I've beans'd you back because I like cuddles and fluffy kisses xx PS - fair point about the notes, thanks. To be fair I'm a relative newbie to games and forums in general so am learning by trial and error here.

Thanks iBane - I was curious, hadn't noticed it, and you answered the question. Thanks Mdogg - I hadn't read the patch notes (hence the question) but you managed to light up my day with such a witty and clever reply. I would give you my beans but I'm so stupid I wouldn't understand how to do that without smashing them into your face.

I agree with you on the logging and said as much. But 4 guys logging out because they didn't like / understand (if they thought he was a hacker) the encounter they had isn't the end of the world (pun intended) at this stage of the development process. And my comment to the OP was to try to suggest that maybe he's taking this all a bit too seriously.

Sorry OP, I should've responded to the post rather than just make a snarky comemt. So... On your own account they said they thought you were a 'hacker'. *If* people assume they genuinely thought that, here's what happened. 1) 4 geared friends looting in a known hotspot. A stranger comes up. He refuses to comply with orders and then runs around taunting them. In your own words 160+ bullets are fired at you, but you remain alive. They move off, disengaging from you, by which time they know you have a sniper friend. You continue to antagonise them, running around and playing 'funny' music. They log off. 2) They go to another server. You and your buddy show up again (by chance, but they don't know that). This time you and your friend kill one of them and loot his body. They again try to kill you without success. They fight back and eventually you and your friend are dead. Are you capable of seeing things from their point of view? At the very worst they're guilty of combat logging. But you and your friend have shown yourself to be hostile - all because they didn't want to engage with you in the first place. I hardly think they displayed "toxic exploiting". But the reason you and your friend ended up dead is not their fault it's yours. If you back off and leave them well alone, maybe go pick a different group to speak to, no one dies.

So many words to say so little.

If there's time I like to loot a body by taking any weapons and ammo and hiding them in the tree line. I was mid way through this once and two geared players showed up and shot me for some of my own gear. I re-spawned close enough that I walked straight back into them. This time they left me alone as I was a bambi without anything and carried on looting my body. I nipped into the trees found the Mosin I'd hidden 5mins earlier and shot one of them. I like to savour the surprise they probably felt at seeing a fresh spawn suddenly come back with a gun.