Funkmaster Rick

Aha! But DayZ is a game of stories and adventure, and Man vs. Nature is an ancient, classic literary struggle. Can't really blame people for searching for more story. =3

I think the animals have evolved to cope with Chernarussian hunting habits. They've mostly headed inland, to the cities most of the scrubs don't bother visiting.

Leather and regular sewing kits do nothing to it, or its constituent parts. How's about duct tape? What's the deal?

Plate carriers provide a +5 bonus to one's pimp-factor, thus protecting you from bullets by blinding the shooters with the sheer power of your swag.

I seem to only find these on dead players, lately. Is there a specific location they're spawning at? Are the devs setting up a predictable route for grabbing end-game gear?

Nine-year-olds are amazing people sometimes. Unfortunately, my experiences suggest that they've complete assholes by the time they hit eleven years. There are far too many squeakers running around bambi-hunting and being obnoxious about it. The ones who yell "Allah-u akbar" while killing fresh-spawns, the shitheels who don't mind chasing you at full sprint for 15 kilometres just to fuck your day up, those are why the vast majority of clans won't even consider anyone below the age of 18. It can be mean sometimes, but people rarely do anything without a reason. That being said, you should totally assemble a giant horde of children to do your in-game bidding. Give them MP5s since their accuracy will probably be shit. They'd be fearless, they don't know any better. Raise an army!

DayZ SA is too brightly-coloured to spawn many urban legends. We need weather effects back before we'll see any real storytelling. Pathetic fallacy is a surprisingly strong force for generating and guiding stories.

When will we be able to build our own refrigerators from parts scavenged in the forest and place them anywhere persistently?

I think there should be a significant difference between the damage taken from falling unexpectedly and the damage from a prepared fall, a planned jump. Honestly, five-foot descents are quite often entirely lethal in DayZ. It's a bit silly.

Handjobs.

I've found two or three on the dead bodies of people I've murdered. It seems to be a pretty consistent spawn.

All of these ideas make me happy.

Honestly, it would be awesome if we had more external carrying capacity in general. I want to hang shit off my coat for people to see. I want to have a hip-holster, or maybe just a sack that hangs off my belt for keeping my swag in. I want an inventory system that allows decoration as well as storage. I want to wear a necklace made of bandit ears. I want to struggle under the weight of a pack that leaves me hunched and hobbled. Maybe even hang tassels from my pants and canteens from my vest.

Definitely a very playable patch. Saline+IV down to one slot is lovely. No-matches fire-starting is excellent. MP5s for everyone, even the horrible nabz.

Do be fair, Herro, the plate vests currently in the game do not have ceramic inserts. If they were, they'd take bullets like high-Gothic plate armour took arrows. They'd shrug and say, "Meh."

Allow the swapping of magazines between one's gun and inventory. I'd like to be able to drag a fresh magazine from my backpack into the gun, and have the used magazine go in the same place as the fresh one came from. Bonus points if it comes with animations that indicate where the magazines are obtained and replaced.

If previous changes of this sort are worth going by, any Mosins after the change will fail to accept LRS scopes (which will no longer spawn). Old Mosins with LRS scopes already on them will probably continue to function as they do now. If you detach the LRS, chances are you will not be able to reattach it.

200+ rounds, myself. Two runs of the NWAF+Veresnik milbase. I also find them inside houses.

1. Yes. Weekly maintenance no longer wipes persistence, except if something unusual happens, of course. So your stuff is never really safe, but it's safe enough for all intents and purposes. Be aware that private servers sometimes still perform persistence-wipes to manage lootsplosions, avoid lag, and the such. 2. Yes, though backpacks decay more rapidly than tents, and I think the things inside backpacks are not safe from decay. So backpacks are only a good storage option for a day or less, in my opinion. Mostly I just use them to hold my good stuff while I try something dangerous. 3. Yes, these will stay, but they will decay very quickly. Don't leave these around for more than a handful of hours, just in case.

Getting 'out-played' by rubberband-laggy 12-year-olds, taking a bullet to the head when they're facing 180 degrees away from me. And then listening to them gloat. Sometimes it's like people want me to gear up as fast as possible and come back to completely break their confidence before finally killing their toon. Some things just can't be helped, you know?

Your observations are canny and accurate. Zombies are a lot more fun and interesting than in past iterations. However, they currently are stealthy ninjas whose footsteps make no sound. They have a nasty tendency to sneak up on your and start hitting you from behind with no warning. Regarding pumps, it's been a week since I last played, but you should still be able to drink from them directly via the action menu, though I think the actual interaction area on the pumps was moved around a little.

In agreement with Dagwood, it's much easier to notice things when you're moving slowly. When you're healthy and doing alright, give yourself the luxury of time - it will pay dividends.

This is a good one. I'm also in favour of hiding active grenades inside teddy bears, dropping them on the ground as a gift so bandits don't shoot me. I wish I could adjust the fuse a bit, but as long as it catches their eye enough to draw them in, and I run fast, it's theoretically sound.

Angry bears that roam the woods, killing all who spoil their territory. Also, I want to tame them and ride them gloriously into Cherno with a repeater, cowboy hat, and nothing else. Or maybe I'm thinking of horses? No, no, definitely want to ride bears.

The new renderer is basically Lando Calrissian. Right now, while we're waiting for it, it's good. Once it gets here, it will appear very bad. But then it'll save us all in the end.